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Flicker of Hope or a cruel reminder

Posted on : 06-02-2009 | By : Lucy Loveless | In : Lucy Loveless

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I came home from work today and as usual, turned on the computer to see what has been happening with my cyber friends. I was shocked to see my ex’s name on an epmail in my in box. It was only a “forward”, he didn’t write anything, but as soon as I saw his name, I felt my face turn red and get hot. That is how excited I got, just from seeing his name. I can’t help but wonder what his purpose is in contacting me in any way. Does that mean he thinks about me? misses me? jsut wants me to think of him?? I am going to try to date and go on with my life, but up to now, every time I have tried to date, I have been looking for my ex, and of course I was always disappointed in anyone I went out with because they weren’t “him”. So, I had decided not to date. That was before our reunion at New Years. After that is when I decided I have to make myself go on with my life. I guess I’ll wait and see what else happens and if I hear anything else from him. I still deep in my heart wish he would call me and tell me all those devoted things I want to hear….. fairy tale. I should have outgrown that fairy tale thinking by now but obviously, I have not. Flicker of hope? or a cruel reminder? I’ll let you know. Meanwhile I remain, Lucy “loveless”

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