Stay Best Friends or Be a Couple??

Hi, I am a freshman in college. My best friend and I have been friends for four years and going to be five in a couple of days. He knows I have a rule of beening friends with guys and i am not trying to make nothing more than friendship. But right now, I think im in love with him. I don’t know what to think, because I have never been in love. I never like the word of Love, i saw many friends and family members that are so torn up about it for a couple of years and some are happy with the word love. He told me already he loves me, and its just been about close to four months since he said it. I don’t know if i should believe him. He has never told anybody he loves them. He didn’t even tell his ex-girlfriend who was pregnant but had a miscarriage he loved her. Im the first girl he can tell. Him and I are very similar in ways we don’t understand. We both hated the word love, we are totally honest with each other even when it is very hurtful, we don’t see our lives without being there for each other, we are total goof balls, we are opposite of each other, and we like each others company. Ever since he had said he loves me, we have been talking about the feelings he has been having. I say its just the spring fever, but I don’t know if he really does love me or not. He wants to make it more than bestfriends and take the next step to being a couple. Sometimes I would want to be a couple with him, then i change my mind very quickly about things i am unsure of. But i also want to keep us as bestfriends because i am afraid, if we do try are we going to be able to be bestfriends even if we don’t work out. I don’t want to lose him. When we just hang out with just him and me, its like he is a total different person, he shows me what kind of guy he is when he is in a relationship. It’s just my fear of losing him that is keeping me from going along with him and meeting him the other half way. I havent told him about my feelings for him because I don’t want to get hurt for thinking he was serious. I don’t know what to think or say. I want us to stay best friends. I try to say lets take a break from talking to each other, but it never works. We both need each other. And nobody else in our group of friends, which are merely guys, knows about his feelings for me. We have been keeping it a secret from everybody. Im going out of my mind not speaking to anybody i know about it. Can you help me please?

(Screen) Name: Jessica

I think I was friend zoned? :(

Ok so I need some help. I’m so confused with life. So this might be really long because I’m going to give the whole story.  Ugh where to start… (ps there’s an extremely condensed version at the end if you don’t want to read all this.)
 So I’ve liked/loved my best friend for 6 years. & I feel ridiculous because I’m 18 and I’m getting worked up over a little crush but I figure it’s the same crush I’ve been getting worked up over for the last 6 years so maybe there’s hope and I won’t be stuck as a sad lonely cat lady? Ok rambling….background info time. 
I’ve known this guy – well call him Ben – since I was 5. We were kinda friends for two years and then he switched schools and I pretty much forgot about him. Flash forward to 8th grade: I’m 12/13, shy, and I don’t really talk to anyone. My little 12 year old heart is traumatized because one of my best friends (Beth) kissed the guy that I had liked all of 7th grade.  So keep in mind we  went to a small school – like 15 kids top in a grade small – so there was no getting away from her and her constant rambling about how she loved him.  I was sad and depressed and decided that I wouldn’t get so attached to a stupid crush again. 
 In walks Ben. He’s everything I’m not. He’s artistic, social, outgoing, sweet, and everyone loves him. He’s also best friends with Beth and – according to her – has a huge crush on her but she couldn’t care less.  Number one on the list of admirers is my best friend at the time: Stacy. Now Stacy liked anything that looked remotely male and when Stacy liked someone, she got possessive and saw only what she wanted to see. Ben was even a flirt back then; he was a very smooth talker. He flirted with all the girls, he brought us all flowers on valentines day, told us all we looked especially beautiful on that day, and loved to give hugs; he was a charmer. I didn’t care at all. I was still sad about the whole Beth incident, and the fact that Stacy liked Ben made him that much of a no-go. He was a friend to me, and that was it. 
Well, like any little girl, when a sweet guy constantly flirts and tells you you’re pretty and gets you to talk when you usually make an effort to say as little as possible, you start to like him. Now this is one crush I kept completely silent. I’d learned my lesson with Beth. After about 6 months I told one friend and that was it and I knew nothing would happen. Our 8th grade trip came, and Ben and I got closer. We talked all the time, hung out the whole trip, and I was getting more and more confident in everything. The end of the year comes, and just like the previous year, my little chubby heart was broken. Stacy kissed Ben. 
Now Ben didn’t know about my crush and I intended to keep it that way. Especially after that kiss. As sad as I was, I couldn’t not talk to him. All through the summer we talked. We’d text every day, he’d send me good morning texts, and we’d talk on the phone for hours; it was great. It got to the point where I was thinking that he might actually like me back and it might actually be going somewhere. High school started and with it came a very shocking fact: Ben had a girlfriend. 
 Ben made sure I wasn’t mad at him for not telling me about her and I reassured him that something like that couldn’t kill our friendship. When I saw them together it killed me a bit but he seemed really happy so I let him be. Now Beth didn’t have the same mentality as me. She decided that Ben was hers. She wrote him letters, begged him to like her instead again, and ranted about how much she hated his girlfriend. This went on all through high school. 
Now as high school went on, Ben and I stayed best friends. We’d have our on and off periods; we were a lot closer in 9th grade than in 10th, but got closer in 11th, and by the time we hit senior year, he was my best friend. We sat together in almost every class we had together, and we talked all the time. I’d make sure he stayed awake in class; he’d make sure I didn’t let the stress get to me. He’s the reason I survived high school. 
On our senior trip, we got even closer. He played me my favorite song on the guitar, we hung out practically the entire time, and I fell asleep on him. By this time, all my girlfriends swore we were going to get together. I didn’t think anything of it because we’re girls and we fantasize about everything and we’re blind when it comes to what guys want to do. But then lots of my guy friends started hinting at things. They talked about making bets as to when we’d finally get together and admit that we were perfect for each other. There was only one problem with their theory: he was still dating the same girl from 9th grade.  
Come graduation and Ben starts talking about how we’re never going to see each other again and he’ll miss seeing me all the time and he wished our friendship could survive going to different colleges. We graduated, and our friendship just got stronger. Even though I wasn’t with him 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, I felt closer to him. We texted all the time again, talked on the phone, and he’d always come over to swim. It was the summer after 8th grade all over again. Beth got over him, and so did Stacy. I was the last crush standing. (or the only one too stupid to move on.) I moved away to college but came back to visit every weekend, and I’d see him all the time. We’d make sure to do something at least once a month, and when we’d hang out it would be for hours and hours. I got, and lost, my first college boyfriend and called Ben crying. (On another note, don’t trust football players who are 3 years older than you and swear it doesn’t bother them that you have a purity ring. It’s a lie.) During the conversation, he confided that he and his girlfriend had broken up two months before. Even though I was depressed about mr. football douche, I couldn’t help but feel that spark of hope that maybe, just maybe, there was a chance for me. 
Now current time. I see him all the time and talk to him almost every day. He’s always sending me sweet “I’m thinking of you” or “I love you” texts out of the blue. Better yet, he sends me pictures of kittens. Now that’s a keeper right there. His roommate – whom I’ve known since I was 3 – makes comments like “just marry him already” all the time. He comes by my house all the time and takes me places. We hang out and he asks my parents when they want me home and insists on paying for stuff for me and I can’t help but feel like it’s what dating should be like.  
But I think I’m being friend zoned! He always says stuff like “I don’t know what I’d do if we weren’t friends.” or “I’m so glad we stayed friends even though we graduated.” or “you’re my best friend!” It’s killing me. So all you guys out there, is this just friendly flirty attitude? Or is this going somewhere? Or am I just being a girl and overanalyzing everything? Ugh. Any advice on what I should do?

I like/love my best friend and have liked him for 6 years. He flirts with me and talks to me almost every day and takes me out but then makes friend-zoney comments like “I’m so glad we’re friends.” I don’t know what to do or think. Does he like me or am I just a friend to him? And what should I do?

(Screen) Name: Abby

Shall i be with her ???

Hi frnds

I am in love with girl, she is of other religion, in our relation of 2.5 yrs, I have caught him 2times with other guys.
With one he was flirting & with other ( who lives in same appartment of her) she was in just attachment as he use to teach her.
1.After I caught her second time, I am just confused whether shall i keep our relationship or shall i part.
2. I have also experienced that our relationship from her side is not deep as it was earlier. May be it is of same dept but she always tries to avoid our secret meets.
What should i do

(Screen) Name: PC

It Was Over Before It Even Started

Hey, i’m going to tell you my story. It all started about a month ago. A guy in my Tech class has caught my attention before by his good looks. I do believe the first thing he ever said to me was “Like my wood ;)?” because he was holding a piece of wood haha.. Anyways, He was a major flirt twards me for at least a month and it was slowly progressing. Of course at first I didn’t really think about all the attention that he was giving me but then I relised and I joined in on the flirting. He got touchy; at first thing he did was over the top which was smacking my butt so hard that it hurt to sit. After, it cooled down. He’d say really sweet things to me over Facebook and through texting also during class. He would give me nice big warm long hugs, and when I’d be laying on my desk with my arms out he’d put his head right next to mine. He’d even take my hands and kinda play with them in a cute little way. Everything was slowly working up and I finally relised that I liked him ALOT. I would be so shy around him and always blush and be awkward.We’d also always text everyday, and he admited that he liked me alot.

On the first day of Easter break my mom ruined it all for my by telling me that were 6th cousins.. Turns out that our grandmas are related somehow but it’s not by blood so it wasn’t a big deal. Being half freaked out and not thinking much of it, I texted him about it we kinda joked around, despite the fact that we were both freaked out, and it got kinda awkward. Before bed at 11:30pm I texted him basically saying “Sorry about earlier, I hope you still like me”. He replied with a message that made my heart sink. The message said this: “I do like you, but I have to tell you something because I can’t keep leading you on. I like you a lot but I can’t date girls, I find myself to be strapped down and to feel like I’m controlled. I’m telling you because I’ll end up just hurting you more and I can’t do that.I know this sounds so harsh and yes I know, I’m an ass hole but it’s better if you stay away from liking me because you will just get hurt”. I read it and was like WTF. I tried to make sense of it all and that just made me cry. I had no idea what to do. I texted back basically saying that I understand what he’s trying to say, and it’s to late because I fell for him. I thanked him for kind of giving me a “heads up” I said that we could still like each other without having to date, and that we could just have a “thing”. I also offered that if he wants to talk more that I would be there for him. I tried texting him twice on Easter, and he didn’t reply.

On Tuesday when school started up again we didn’t even talk. He probably though I was mad at him because my body language suggested that I was bitchy, so he didn’t even bother talking to me. My friends said he kept eyeballing me. I tried to avoid his gaze, and I was successful at doing so. Today, my group was gone, so I was the only one sitting at my table. I was terribly lonely so I moved to his, which also had 2 other people at it. He actually talked to me first, and we had mini conversations. He kept cracking jokes and I kept laughing at them. We caught each others gaze a few times and each gave each other a little smile. Other then that, I was extremely quiet and the whole thing just felt awkward because I’m used to us talking all the time and acting different twards each other.

I still really like him and I think he still likes me also. If you like someone long enough to chase them, you can’t just drop them right away. I’ve been kinda depressed about the whole thing. I want to fix things, but I don’t no if I should or how. For now I’m going to go with the flow, but I’m still holding on and I don’t want to lose him this soon. Thanks for reading all of this and if you have any questions or advice then please let me know.

(Screen) Name: Molly

Dating website

I recently went to an online dating service and signed up and created a profile with a photo of myself which included my body but not my face (I’m not naked in the photo, don’t worry). What I didn’t expect is that the guy that gave me my first kiss over 16 years ago responded and we started chatting. I was head over heels in love with this guy in high school but years have passed since and I haven’t talked to him since. Now that we’ve started chatting on this dating website all the old feelings are coming back but the problem is that I don’t think he has any idea that it’s me he’s talking to. I should have told him it was me the minute he responded but I got nervous and froze up and now we’ve been flirting online for weeks and he keeps asking to take me out on a date and I keep postponing it. Should I tell him it’s me? What if he gets mad and rejects me? I really like this guy, maybe even love him, and I don’t want to lose him. I have no idea what to do.

(Screen) Name: angel2366

which is my true love??

hi im in grade 8 :)i have a big crush on to boys but i dont even know which 1 i like they both are fun,cool,kind,believes in what is right. but if you see my friends like them to they think i like boys from other school and they think i hate them but i can’nt tell them i like them at all because they all get jealous 1 boy is ver poplaur around the school but he is a flirt type he says he go out with all these gurls i think its a but the 2nd guy is alot diff he is alittle hated but not as much he is not a geek both are briany but they arent geeks but the second guy is nt much of a flirt does nt knw wat blush mean or flirt he is soo funny
im so worried if i should tell my friends??
will they get mad or say eww he does not suit you??
which guy suits me??
do you think they will like me to ??
🙂 🙂 thxs soo much 4 ur help

(Screen) Name: jane

mutual attachment!! pls. give me advice 2 forget HIM!

hi!!.. 1 need some of your advice..
i fall in love in a guy through cellphone, (weird??)we communicating each other thru cp,and fb.. we plannd to meet this month.
his a childhoodfriend of my bestfriend.. we started exchange txt messages last jan.last week of that month(he said we had a mutual attch.)and i agree..
we getting closer to each other,we share alot of things in life, he is a kind of post.person, straight talker, typical frank! sometimes we had argue, cuz i felt insulted in some of his advices, for me he is so insensitive!
although i tried to understand him. cause i dont want to loss him.
the moment
that i been waiting for..hahaha
last feb.10 we officially bf\gf, we try the long distance relatinshp,
but after 4days we broke up exactly valentines day.. i know its all my fault no 3rd party involve, maybe i had an att.problem, i sed sorry and i swallow my pride for him..
i knew he felt my sincerity for saying it!!
we had no formal break up..altough his not saying his quit! i feel by his action,
i felt his avoiding me, he ddnt col/texts, i feel hurt! i want to talk to him but his far from me, his working in some place in cebu.
days,months pass..
i feel all alone,incomplete and empty, 2months after. i got only more or less 20txt mssgs from him! i tried to fade my feelings for him, but its really hard.
i longing for his presence, for his warm voiece, sweet txt, and everything in him ..
i really really miss him!!
wat shud i do? this is a time to give up?> how>? everynight i cry, reminiscing our past relationship!
i am a foolished one, im still assuming that one of this day he text or call me saying that he miss me too..and he want to see me personally!
do u think i need to assume?
or i need to move forward.. all i want his word and say he ddnt love or like me na!! afer that i can assure him , that im not inerfering him again!
pls !! help me!!! i need your advice!!

(Screen) Name: stupidgurl


i did longing for a true love for a very long time.I had a serious relationship when i was 18,we shared all for 8 years,help each other to achieve our dreams then someone came and he cheated me and left me behind and i almost lose my life and i cant move on..I had my classmate who’s courting me for 4 years and even i cant find the love i made my mind to try to be in a relationship again but still it didnt work,i know i am not ready thats why it end up this way. then after 2years i had a fling relationships till one day i slept with this guy,i only knew for a week and got pregnant..i thought it will be easier because i want to have a child even without a husband but lately i realized i love this man..because of unplanned pregnancy resposibility took place,and it seems he had so many girls,we planned to get married but when that day come,he told mehe is not ready…i got mad and out of that anger i threw words i know i made him hurt to…2 years had past still i cant forget him..and he,still try to communicate with me.but we were civil,i dont know if he love me the way i did..i discovered he has a son with his ex he had an accident and told me now your happy what had happened to me, i answered i am not,id rather had bad times with you rather than losing you..i didnt direct him of my true feelings but rather i took the opportunity to say to him that i care.i told him his son is not a problem with me,and began to talk about his son with me unlike then,i am leaving the country for work and i told to leave our son to him, he asked me to come to their place with our son, before leaving the country to bring our son to their place..their place is very far from our place,i dont know how to react..what should i do?i love him but i am afraid to be hurt again..should i grab that opportunity to reconcile…

(Screen) Name: out of love

Callum Vincent-Squibb Sophiie_kate Jones

We back stabbed our mate Robert so that we could be a couple. Sophie dumped him for me. We even took the mick out of him by saying we would go places with him while we were still a secret. It’s all out in the open now and we are a proud couple. We don’t care what the cost to us is in family or friends; we are that self-absorbed and shallow. We both would walk over our friends for our own selfish needs. And the friends we have now are as good as we are for supporting us. WE ARE DIRTBAGS AND EVERYONE KNOWS IT!!!!!!!

(Screen) Name: Sophiie_kate

Was it Love?

Me and my boyfriend broke up about 5 months ago. He left me for some other girl. I am over him but my biggest concern is whether i truly even loved him because i was with him for 3 1/2 yrs. So heres my story:

The first day i met him i saw him and i thought wow hes cute but i guess i kinda liked him but not seriously. We got to know each other and when we hanged out 3 days later we kinda got set upped and it was just him and me. he was so shy and cute and he told me he liked me. i was so red and i thought yay but i am usually weird like that when anyone tells me they like me but he was cute so it was extra weird. The same day i tell him i like him too caz he made me feel happy and i went out with him. I was really happy he was so shy cute and innocent. He waited for me hugged me and i thought he was different. Warning sign number 1: our first fight was because i was super embarassed of what i did*nothing to serious* and i ran away. My friend went to sit next to me seein how embarassed i was and when my ex came he was tryin to be near me but i was so embarassed infront of him i was shooin him away but not seriously…then he grabbed his hat out of my head i was wearin and almost made me fall caz i was on top of something. Then hes like Fine im leaving then….i was really sad caz it was only because i was embarassed…then i was about to leave really sad then he grabs me and tries to apologize after seein me so upset and i just said i want to leave then he wouldnt let me go and i tried gettin out and he didnt until i agreed to talk to him…..mind u this came from something sooooo little. Anyways after that our relationship was still good for a couple of months but then we started fighting a lot because i had a lot of family issues and he said that i took it out on him. he was so sensitive and insecure around me and i wasnt with him. I feel like that had a major role in our fights because he didnt like me hanging around so many guys….anyways fast forward 1 1/2 yrs he steals 600 dollars from me i find out caz i checked his bank account which i trusted him to keep my money stupid yes i know but i had no other choice family reasons…then he tries to blame it on me because i had to take his debit card in order to find out he stole from me……i forgive him…fast forward he keeps bothering me that im embarassed of him with his friends because he hasnt seen them in a while..Reasoning: On prom he made fun of how i danced acted like his year was better ignored me and dance with some other girl when i left him to see my other friends in school and he didnt want to come with me..he made me cry really bad infront of the people i cared about…thus lost most of my friends because i spent time with him and i was afraid that my friends would tell me to break up with him…i took care of him when he was sick i cooked for him came to visit him when he was takin care of his sister played xbox ps3 i did everything he asked of me. i did his hw for 8 classes and more got into his colleges and got him his job….he complained how i failed at doing his hw but i always got higher then a B+ and he would curse at me call me useless trash and verbally abuse me when i got into a fight with him. i always wanted to know what i did wrong or how i could fix it so yes i admit in callin him and textin him way too much..but all i got back was verbal abuse and whenever i cried he mocked me and played songs that cursed at me…then we broke up and he used me and said o i was goin by my feelings but now i dont feel anything for u….so yea..Hoolidays were the worst.
1st Thanksgiving: we got into a fight and then i had to apolgize
the first christmas wasnt so bad but the next one he was away and the other he didnt really do much
valentines day it was good but we did get into a fight we i had to apologize for, 2nd one i was a lil upset caz we got stickers and i wanted him to it on his laptop or somewhere but hes like i dont want to waste it…and i just got a lil sad and quiet but then hes like great ur gonna ruin everything because of his then i said no im sorry and then he ignored me shoved me away caz i was crying and people looked at me and he was keep tryin to shove me…3rd valentines day we celebrated it early and it was actually the best.the day of valentines day he was upset ccaz i didnt buy protection and he was “indicating” he wanted it but then i said y dont u get it ill give u the money but then he refused…and he just sat there…and im like really its 5 mins away…and i told him to go away because he was there almost an hour saying nothing….and then he left me alone to go home..i was like u go home but u cant go to the store which is 5 mins away and i always had to buy it caz he was literally broke 24/7 for me but for his games he wasnt broke…
my birthday: we were supposed to celebrate it he never showed up caz he was 4 hours late and he was like i was with my friends im leavin now and i said i thought u said we were meeting at this time i hav been waitin..and hes like im tired of u bitchin then he cursed at me and then arrived at my real birthday tryin to break up with me
2nd birthday he wasnt there he went away
3rd birthday he showed up 5 hours late…and me cryin my eyes out
and the first gift i had to pay for half of it…and he barely took me out.

his birthday: i got him his favorite game went to the arcade got him breakfast took him out for lunch and spent the whole entire day with him and bought him a cake got him an xbox his toys and whatever he wanted and took him Nobu……
and he would always make me wait 1 hour 2 hours the most was 5 hours and he never showed up….
..i have had my fair share too of wrongs too i get it..i was needy i wanted to talk to him at least once a day…caz i thought i missed him..we had our fair share of good times that why i thought this is worth it..i thought he knows me so well and he helped me to push me to be a better person with me family but that was when we were first going out after a while he basically did nothing for me….but i used to cut myself because he verbally abused me and i felt like i was losin my sanity…i went on his aim caz he blocked me for no reason and wouldnt talk to me so i would unblock myself but he justified it by going on my fb dleting my friends changing my profile pic and my statuses basicaly everything…i would get mad because i felt like he didnt appreciate me and since he stole money from me he would buy 100 things for himself and i would be like…what about the money u stole…then he said u always talk about money money….when we first broke up it was because of me because i didnt want to be with him he was so sensitive and i had so much to deal with already….i made him cry a lot when we first went out for maybe 8 months in and out because i was always doing something wrong but i cant even remember what i did….but i always felt so guilty so i tried my best…and he has a mask and he told me i helped him get out of his mask..but to be honest i think he was more vengeful towards me then any other person..i wanted to help him because his biggest fear was being alone and i felt like i could help him and i would love him…but i dont know anymore..i feel like he was a mistake and that i never loved him..there good times where i felt like im gonna marry him he knows me so well because hes so cute and he knows everything about me…but i didnt even know me anymomre i was wat he wanted me to be..and even with everything he knew that happened to me he took advantaged of him and used me until the very end and then got a gf a week after we broke up saying he doesnt want a relationship hes confused hes tired of me he wouldnt do anything with anyone else until he gets married….only to find out hes fucking that girl the moment they go out….im not mad about that its just how can i possibly say i loved this person.he told me he wanted to see a future with me that he could wake up to me and that he loved me…i even asked him before we broke up do u honestly love me and he said yes and i didnt even want him to answer right away…the week he broke up with me we got into a fight because i was doing his hw and i was late so he didnt get full credit and i was just so effin tired of him treating me like a failure so i lashed out and called him a lazy person who treats me like a slave instead of a gf..then we make up..but then we fight because he didnt get some stupid tails and ears thing from a game and i said to him look we just had a wonderful day i cooked for u we spent time together theres no reason to be sad i love u and if it was my fault im sorry and he said ur sayin the right things but in the wrong way then i apologize only from him to bother me late at night when i work the next day and i was sleepin so then he keeps complaining how i wasnt being supportive and i said look ur being demanding now then he said i couldnt handle him and im like really………..and then i told him how i felt that he was taking advantage of him and he didnt appreciate me but i still wanted to work it out just for him to say im tired of u…lets break up…and i was with him for 3 1/2 yrs how can i ever know what love is when all the guys i dated were pigs and ive been used most of my life…im a stronger person now and i learned but seriously how the heck am i ever gonna know what love is………..sorry for such a long story but yea thank you if you did read this.

(Screen) Name: kloil1