My first love

It all started when all the girls in my class were gathered around the ‘player‘ in our grade. We were all literally around him and we were asking him who he likes because it was a certain that he really likes someone among us.

We were all saying each others’ name and he’d say no to every single one of them. Then came mine. When my name was called out, he looked at me in the eyes and didn’t say a word. Everyone caught onto that apparently because even the class president decided to make us an official couple.

As i was young and naive, i just like him because, well, he’s hot.

But what i realised as i got to know him a lot better that he was never  a player, i was his second girlfriend. and he was a lot more kinder than everyone thought he was. N0t just that, he’s very loyal and he’d get jealous and mad whenever i hung out with guys and i’d cheer him up saying that i only love him.

In class, he sits in front of me so we’d hold hands secretly. We’d argue so often and would make up like nothing happened. We’d hide at the back of the class room and he’d sneak a cheek kiss and thats when i tell myself ‘wow, i’m in love with this guy

Of course every relationship have its ups and downs, we’d fight and make up but after high school we went to different colleges and it was weird. We tried to the very end to make the long distance relationship work. Well at least he thinks he tried.

The college i went to, a few of his friends also go there so i expect him to ask them about me. So as i was walking back to the dorm with a guy friend talking about a tv show we both loved, i thought about how his friends might see me with this guy and get the wrong idea so when i got home, i texted him saying i was walking to the dorm with a guy friend. Guess he couldn’t take it anymore and he said ‘ you like him, don’t you? that’s why you’re telling me this’

I tried. I tried to explain, but before i did he said ‘ let’s break up, i can’t take this anymore, i love you and all but it’s really hard to trust you and i hope we can be friends

and i didn’t even try to stop him.

I just let him go.

I wish i didn’t let him go that easily.

Now he’s gone

I want him to come back

Please.

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