Purged Too Many Times

Like many I began wearing my sister’s panties and slips when I was 10 or 11.  Through out my life and kept dressing trying more things such as bras, skirts, blouses etc.  But I have tried to stop and on at least 3 occasions ave purged my clothes.  So mad about that as I have some really lovely and sexy things.  Now that I am in my 50s I have come to realize that I do really enjoy it and am accepting and embracing even more.


Okay before anything, I’m gonna clarify certain things. This man I’m gonna confess about, is my cousin which I only started to get close to during my teenage years .My childhood is spent without him.So here goes,

2006,during my final term school holiday which is about November,i met him, my cousin for the first time in many years. I was 12 going 13 while he is 18.things were quite normal but not how cousins were normally expect to behave ard each other . pecks on the cheek , forhead.slowing becaming smooches but no sex.he was wif someone back den , so am i.this goes on a 3years.imagine aching for someone dat long!p/s we tried avoiding each other,we cant.wenever our eyes met,the sexual tension is too strong.

wen I turn 16 , That’s wen ,I don’t know how,surely because we both ant it so much,we started having sex.it was out of the world ,really.i mean  (saving the detail for another time) somehow we are not really together. we both have our partner.

Finally I got married,i stopped trying to want him .its hard.but its right.long story short,my husband cheated on me,and I called him.the first person I call.it started out innocent enuf.and then sex.this time,its different.he put me first.making me feel dat I am really with him.im still staying wif my husband den.

the woman hes with,is not our country resident,which make the son they had together not a resident of our country too since they are not married.to save that situation,the eventually tie the knot.

I was the first he told the decision to,with teary eyes….and guess wat?our affair is still going on….I am with someone now.trying to avoid him…but at times,i feel as if I’m gonna falter…..

is this love?has fate decided that we are not to be with each other?if so, why do are we having this strong feelings?????


First Love Shit

Here I want to write my Love-fling-story.

I am a girl at the age of 27 years, At the age of 22year I madly fell in love with My Teacher , She was outstanding, gorgeous,breathtakingly beautiful. I was in the second semester I even didn’t know that it is just a fling or attraction or any kind of serious love shit. She lived at the same hostel which was allotted to us. I never ever get the chance to talk to her actually everybody thinks that she is bloody egotistical and eccentric person. She didn’t talk student outside from the classroom etc. Anyway, I was just happy by seeing her  in corridors, another class room , teacher rooms etc. I never very eager to talk to her actually I get nervous when I see her, she was a perfect woman of any bodies. She was in her 28 or 29 years , with sharp and edgy figure and a beautiful face which is adorable. She has a huge fan following and I am one of them.

One lucky day the announcement was done that all the second-semester girls have to meet in the room number 205 for discussion of the annual festival. After finishing our meal all the hostel girl of the second semester gather downstair and I was way behind from them because I didn’t like the festival,dance,singing etc. When every body stuffed in that room I was standing at the door line I just don’t want to listen what the seniors want to say. I was standing at the minute later I heard the sound which was a bit familiar my heart was started to pound I managed some gap and able to saw that the women of my dream is to sit on the right angle to me I was shocked that the room was her . Again I don’t have anything to say on that discussion that why i remain to hide in the crowd . The d- day came and i have some responsibility like anchoring and some small role in play. In the preparation of the annual fest I came to know her little more , we had some discussion regarding my role in fest. As I was one of my sems topper so I was known   by faculty members. She treated me nicely and I was like over the cloud that she talks me so nicely and i was not sure why every second person doesn’t like her.  However, I was enjoying my portion of getting notice by the Teacher . I like when she talks, I get nervous when she touched me , I like that she convey all the message via me . After completing the second semster and in result i was the topper and luckily the same teacher was not allotted for teaching one subject. And I get special attention as every topper get . She talks me , She also like when i asked something to her, In one word we were become sort of friends . She sometimes kissed on my chicks (as my friends say I am kinda cute).

It all started at the day, We had an agreement that at the end of day i will meet her and We will share how the day goes and what we should or could did. One particular day I was got late and reached in her room her room was lock from inside I knocked and after sometime she opened the door and she was angry at me. I was trying to uplift her and in that way, i kissed her chicks , forehead , chin and nearby area of ears . She was very angry at that time I was trying to my level best to uplift her . She started to cry and i was not able to understand why she was crying , I hugged her and after some time she revealed me that she was in a relationship and relationship was last for 8 year and after that, the boy’s family was not convinced for their marriage  and they have to break their relation. She was very fragile at that time.I console her and I was not sure what to say and I am very bad at the wording . I only hugged her and I sleepover at that night hugging her . It was turning point in our life she finds a friend in her life and I was happy that i get her attention. It was my daily ritual to met her.

Now I was in the fourth semester, One night i won a bet and in return, she had to kissed me . I was lying on a bet and she came and kissed my chick and after she placed her lips on mine. It was so quick i didn’t get it and was silent I had no words to say anything after some time she placed her lips on mine and it was my first kiss I was not aware what I have to do but it felt nice and I don’t know where i came I started to replicate her steps and it was nice french smooch. Then suddenly she parted away and feel guilt for the act but i was hugging her from the backside.

After that day things changed we become friend with benefit, From her i learned many things and one thing is this. After two-year, she left the college and married to Man. As we both knows that our relationship has no future.

After 4 years, we broke all the contact because it was hard for me to see her in another life and she was busy in her life and I missed her badly and I don’t feel that she missed me. It creates a bad impression upon me and I don’t want to love another person. I feel that she used me as a replacement. And I have a bitter feeling for everyone . I don’t know should I clear my doubt ? or I leave my past and move forward?

“The love of my life”

I never thought I will fall in love to an attractive ,a very intelligent and humble guy. Way back then, when I was grade 7. I have classmate name Jink. The first time i laid my eyes on him, i know i’m attracted to him. Until one day , one of my classmate use my phone because she will text someone then after a while there is someone texted on me and it is unknown number. Then I ask ” who are you?” then he answer “Jink..”. Then our love story started their. I have a bestfriend Yla and Yan. They are myclose friend. One day i didn’t expect what my bffs did. They ask to borrow my phone because they will text someone . Tommorow i ask why he didnt text at me and i was shocked of his ans. ” i thought we broke up”. i try to explained to him but he is deaf to hear it. And after so many years i’m still in love to him.

Head over heels for an actress in the show: My little pony

I’m head over heels with a Canadian voice actress and I am in the united states.  Her name is Andrea Libman and at first it was just a crush, but then it became something more. I heard she’s going to Baltimore for this years Bronycon. I won’t be able to go since I am so far away, unless she wants to come get me which is very unlikely, and because I have social anxiety.  She has many fans who attempt to get her attention online and some of them have even written her post mail.  I write her online.

I hope that someday we can both meet each other and hang out. Then I either want to go with her to Canada or she will stay with me in the United States.  She goes almost everywhere in the usa, so it would make a lot of sense for her to perhaps live here.  Also, her birthday is coming up.  I have no money so I am planning on getting her something for free and put it on her page.  I hope she likes it.

I’m not sure when we’ll meet face to face, but when we do, I hope that I’ll be prepared to face her and I hope I don’t make a fool out of myself.  She’s just so cute and adorable.  I’m  guessing maybe one day, she’ll pop up at my house just as her character, Pinkie does everywhere in the show.  That would be funny.

Please remember me Andrea Libman.  I hope you have a great time at Bronycon and please watch for a special free gift on your birthday.

can you hear me

i like you roll 64 …i want to shout this to my heart’s content .i don’ t know if you are aware of this or not…i mean about my feelings but still.!!! still a year after passing out from the college i can’ t get over it not being able to vapourize it from my heart not only heart but from whole myself..i know there is no future for us and for god’s sake i just can be your partner just for few days or years .i always have a wish that if i commit to someone then i would commit for a life time.wish atleast i could just spit my feelings to you just once and i would feel like a Cotton.. bearing this pain for almost more than 5 years i feel as if i swallowed a heavy iron.i may be or lets say i am a dumb ass to spoil myself for being tight lipped. just for once in my dreamland can you just say you love me too or even miss me would be enough!!! i only know one thing that you dont like me just respect me as a friend.. no extra feelings apart this.i would never impose neither my feelings nor me upon you.i love or whatever you say ok ok ok like you always.

Is dis love or attraction

i dont know how it started bt yes it did…!! i fear to confess it to you for two reasons for u rejecting me either or i ll be breaking ur heart at a point when i could no longer go against my dad whom i love equally .during college days it may be our friends who use to pull our legs about each other…bt yes suddenly my heart made to a point where i secretly started admiring u ,waiting for the sun to rise so i could meet u nxt day in class if was a holiday i wld prompt my close friend to come to the market along wd me so that her bf could come for her though dragging u along with him…eagerly waited for festivals just to allow ur friends make a deliberate wrong call so dat we cld talk …they wld make u drink a little as it trnd my secret benifit coz nrmly u shyd off tlkng to me and i hated that .everybody except u cld see the glow n blush my face beared while we mistakenly had ny conversations..i lykd u to come and ask mesmethng anythng atlest relatd abt studies…buttrflies jumped n danced when it was ur brthdy…i wld willingly wait for me to make a call at 12 midnight ni secrtly made a wsh for ur long life n hapiness…and me waiting for my bday so if nt u ur frnds wld make d frst cal on bhlf of u..frnds mockng us n letting knw d whole cmps on sprts day though me crushng hard my desire to shout out loud yes its true atlst from my side…..going out with my frnds reqstng n pleading them to brng u n othr boys along..i wld always wait for a chance to just bump into u darling..d was d best moment for me invtng u for my bday treat ,dancing and frnds pushng me onto u in d bus at picnic final year …let me tell u a secrt it was my plan so dat i cld hug once in my lifetym ,holding ur hands wld warm n secure me for lifetym n i wld thank that drunkard friend who forced u to hold my hand n dance with me nonstop for half n hour ..i thght what if we cld not spend our future togethr at least for my sake wld confess my feelings to you see ended up confessng here as u were my first love..still its been a year we left clg n movd on in our rspctve lives i cld tell such a small thng to u ….fearng loosng u as a frnd at least..as i lft clg stoppd thnkng abt u..thought it was jst infatuation bt realisd it to be love until i met u again…for i pleaded god to nvr let it happen aftr clg knwing i wld nt be abl to cntrl myslf on ur mere sight..it was while leavng station wd my dad my steps started feeling heavy n my heart bleading..every step i took away from u felt light years..i cried to my hearts content on my seat berth knowing publicly no body wld neithr rcognise me n my feelings wld gt dsprsd amng d crowd…
from first tym i saw u till today i missd u always n like you a lot infact bt i hope to meet someone who wld fill d void creatd by my mistake…hope we meet where theres no boundary for anyone..i wld nvr blame u for my feelings my pain my foolishness my choice to love or like you..

Made A Mistake In Love & now suffering

I was in 18 , 12th class,  Smart , studious , Cricket Team captain , well behaved , Joyfull guy . I had no. of female friends , I got attracted to a girl named Geetima , she was Beautifull , studious , her smile always mesmerised me , I use to look at her turning back in the class , she was in a group of 5 girls , they use to stay together all the time , during class sessions , in break . Most of the time what use to happen was , I use to see Geetima and some other girl in her group use to watch me and start smiling and use to think like I am looking at her and not Geetima . Geetima had a friend named Shiksha , they were besties  they both use to stay together . And whenever I use to see Geetima , it seemed to evryone like I am staring at shiksha , but I liked Geetima , I was just meamerised by her , I liked her voice , her Eyes were like an addictive drug and the time when she use to give me a smile , I use to feel like today is going to be a best day . She somewhere knew that I like her ,even if a doubt though , but she use to catch me most of the time whenever I  use to secretly look at her .

On ther hand evryone in the class started thinking that I stare At shiksha and that I like her , but I didn’t , she was a Preety girl , sweet too but I never thght anything about her in that sense .

What happend is evryone starting pulling my leg that we know you like her(shiksha) , but I didn’t like her in that way , I use to like Geetima and loved to see her smile . Evryone kept on teasing me and shiksha by each other’s name , shiksha liked me I knew that , but I couldn’t tell anyone of them that I liked Geetima , now today I feel how dumb I was to shy to tell that I like Geetima and not Shiksha . anyhow , back to the story in the end what happend was I started blvng like yes I think I like shiksha . But the truth was I just liked the thought that I am going to have a girl frnd and shiksha is ready to be my gf , I have to just purpose her and I ll be boy with a gf .

I purposed her and she accepted , evrything was good till frst 3 months or so & then we started fighting with each other on each and evry thing , she use to scream at me and I use to avoid her calls then , she started keeping thi kha from me , our arguements started turning into fights , at last I took the innitiative to take the blame and break up with her , she cried a lot , a lot , she loved me , but I was a pretty sure that I am not going to drop this decision of break up , she tried a lot-a lot to stop me but I didn’t .

She cried a lot , I use to feel  terrible when lookin. At her crying for me , begging me not to go , but I was a dumb asshole , I didn’t agree , and I was so disturbed by that relationship that although I knew how it felt like when someone breaks up with you , that time itself I started feeling the guilt that I am making her suffer a lot but still I didn’t even say once that “okk I ll not go. , we ll not break up” after few months of breakup she started recovering , I use to appologise her her all the time for the pain that I have her , but at the same time I didn’t wanted to live with her , I cared about her , but I didn’t wanted to be her BF . I kept on appologising to her for 4 years , sorry shiksha for the pain I gave to you & she use to say all the time it’s okk I have forgiven you ,still I didn’t felt satisfied by Myslef , after 4 years she started bitching about me , that’s when I realised that yes she has atlast moved on .

Today it has been 5 years since we broke out with each other , & still today the worst mistake that I made in my life was giving Shiksha That Pain.!! I still feel I shouldn’t have played with her feelings when I was not sure of mine .

Consequences of the mistake I made Are.. 1.) Shiksha had to ho though such intense pain , 2.) Although I still dnt love her but I am still in regret of giving her the pain that I might have not given her if I would have realised that if shiksha likes me I should not jump onto the opportunity without even considering the future aspect . 3.) I could never go back to Geetima to tell her that Geetima I like you , give me a chance and I ll prove to you that I am not a cheater . Geetima is still frnds to shiksha , and from the day I broke out with Shiksha , I have never been able to look into the eyes of Geetima , those pretty eyes which Used to mesmerise me evry time I looked at her .

I met Geetima afyer 4 years today in Chandigarh . And all I could do was look onto her eyes and when she turned her face towards me I started  acting like I am talking to someone else .

I wish I could just tell her that I am not the guy that she thinks I am , I made a mistake , I mistakingly hurted Shiksha , I didn’t cheat on her , I didn’t two time , I am myself feeling the regret , I am Myslef appologising to your friend Ahiksha from the past 5 years atleast ask her if you dnt believe me . If I  can’t be her(Geetima)partner , then atleast try to understand that I am not the devil kind of a guy ,as u think Geeti..a .

Anyways , I hope who ever reads my story , will atleast learn something from my MISTAKE.!!

My crush for neighbour women

i am a guy of 24 years, i am having crush on my neighbour who is married but not satisfies with her husband….. one day i was peeping from my window into her bedroom… i saw her half nude my dick got fully erect and i started jerking seeing her half nude body actually she was in bra and panty only….. i started sweating badly as i was frieghtened to get caught if she notice me peeping into her private area…. now i wanna fuck her badly..

Feeling twisted

I have a friend and co-worker, who is now one of my best friends and she is the most amazing woman I have ever met. Her smile lights up my world and I am sad when she isn’t around. I dream of someday kissing her and telling her how much I love her, but I have several problems. One is how different our lives are, not only is she much older than me, she has children and a sort of boyfriend. I am in college and the biggest problem of all is, IM MARRIED! I do love my wife, but I have to confess I love my friend more than I love my wife! I may be a terrible person, but this is how I feel and it is tearing me appart. That is a summary of my confession.