Forbiden

I am 31 years, married twice and 4 boys. I have never been in real love. 5 years ago I fall for my brother in law that I never met before and end up having sex with him. But, he has a best friend that I met before I move with my brother in law. I have feeling for the friend and it look like it is growing everyday. I am still living with my brother in law and we have a son toghether. I know it sound crazy but I am not in love with him althought he said that he loves me.
My concern now is that, I am so confused and I don’t know what to do.
please help!

(Screen) Name: Princess