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Welcome to the Love Story Blog of Love-Sessions.

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Complicated…

Posted on : 25-07-2010 | By : Love Story Writer ... | In : Long Distance Love, Romance Love Story

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I suppose to others, this love story will seem strange, wrong, or even immoral. But to me, it is one of the greatest things that has happened. To make things clear, I am a girl.
I met her a few days after Christmas. The first time we spoke to each other, I knew immediately that I had found a true friend, someone who had so many common interests as me. The only problem; we lived in different countries. So we began messaging each other through MSN, email, and youtube. I soon realized that although we could never physically meet each other, I began to see her in a different light. I knew that I was attracted to both males and females before, but it came as a surprise to me when I slowly developed a crush on her. After about a month questioning my feelings, determining whether or not they were real, I finally decided to tell her I had a form of a crush for her. Her response was that she reciprocated those feelings. A few days later, while messaging her through MSN, I told her that I was wondering what would happen if my feelings ever grew to be more than just a simple crush. I was quite relieved and happy to find that she would never reject my feelings. But she also wouldn’t want to date me until we could meet in person every day. She said she wouldn’t want to tie me down. I understood completely, because I would never forgive myself if I were to cause her pain because she had found someone other than myself that she coveted in such a way. So we remained “just friends.”
Months later, possibly around four, I knew that my feelings had escalated. Very much so. I loved her. I thought that I had loved someone before, but now I realize I never truly had. Not like I loved HER. I only wanted the best for her. In previous relationships, I was extremely jealous, not to the extent where I would voice it, but jealous enough that it would bother me if they were with friends. With this girl, though, it was completely different. I wanted her to be happy, to enjoy everything she could. If her happiness meant we couldn’t speak for days, I was okay with that. I knew I would miss her, but as long as she was okay, I knew I would survive. I wanted to share everything with her, and for her to share everything with me. I’d never allowed a relationship to progress as far as this one has/had. I mean that in the sense that I know things about her. Things I’d never known about exes. As I said before, I love[d] her. So, naturally, I told her. I never expected her reaction to my words. She told me that she wasn’t sure what she was feeling. That she looked forward to it every day. That every time she spoke to me, it made her happy and excited. And then… She told me that she loved me, and that she had never felt this way towards anyone. With those words, I thought my heart would explode from all the joy. I cried tears of happiness at her confession.
To this day, we still speak. I am waiting for her, and I believe she is waiting for me. If it turns out that she finds another, so be it. As long as she is happy, I am. Now I just have to wait for the day when we are able to actually be together.

(Screen) Name: Kagami~

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