she was 26 and i was 11 , she was shapely, sexy, and very much virgin,i was unspolied, and in my teens. she came to our home after marrying my uncle.who left her and went to distant country for new job.there it was like waiting to happen instant attraction.that was like fatal attraction
somehow i knew from day one that she liked me. she touched me once on my cheeks and that was like electric shock. slowly i started admiring looking at her and got admiring her voluptous breasts.they were so shapely firm and round.
it was that day when no one was home and she kept the bath door open.don’t know if that was deliberate. i got so curious and and looked inside
she was there like mermaid
so glorious in her shapely body .

next day and next day same bath session continued
i know she knew it, we fell in love,
you know how it feels .i was shy scared;she was bold and sexy. the burning desire to touch,kiss her was like insatiable hunger
one fine night it happened,
i was sleeping , dreaming of her in my
arms.suddenly felt some one touching my lips
some thing like rose petal touched my lips,it was her lips on mine
i pulled her closer
we kissed so passionately.

tounges lashibg
twisting
we sucked each other’s nector
next day morning when i woke up
she was gone
iam 85 now
cant forget my first love

(Screen) Name: luvme2

i was 11 when i first talked to him and he was 17, two weeks passed and he asked me if i thought age mattered. i said no, age doest matter if two people are in love. i was really mature for my age and i still am. the day we met was 12.29.09 , and i was fixing to go home and he said wait and ran to me and hugged me and whispered my full name, will you go out with me and i said yes. we are still together and he treats me like im a princess. he promises me he will never leave me…. im just so glad i found someone who would never hurt me and resecpts me. we plan to tell our parents when im 18. i love you so much baby, forever and ever my boo bear

(Screen) Name: snookums122909

hey friends.here is my own story to share with u..i fell in love wen i was 14./it all started the day wen i askd him for friendship.despite the age gap of 9 and half years i was lucky enuf to be accepted as a friend..we exchanged e mail…somtimes chat..only after 2 months we exchanged mobile numbrs..i used to talk frm my mothers fone..(i got my persnl fone i mnth latr)..
rumours spread lik fire ..it had to be we both were the smartest nd the hottest in our respective groups..ppl said “we r just attracted..its not friendship…just infatuation…” .
why do they hav to worry wheathr m attracted or lovd or killed..ppl sue evry blooming relatin with their unnecessary interventions..uff….and then fingers wer raised on our morality..’where the hell is this written that frindsip is immoral’…we decided to quit our frndsip wile talking on fone..we both kept crying the whole nite..u kno, wat is destined cant be prevnted..we were back..we used to say…we will always be frnds…will never becom lovers…but slowly we moved on from frnd to best frnd..we shared almost evrything..after 7 months this bestfrnd tag changed..he proposed me and i cudnt refuse….we were 2gether now..frm then onwards,i was living for him…nd he for me..i have nevr imagind that a boy can b so true nd loyal …the love the happiness i got cannt be expresd in words.many unusual things happened..we faced every difficulty which came our way..and with them our love grew stronger…we became our strenth..we loved nd loved ……….we live in diffrent cities but our soul survives as 1…..guys,u kno wats the best part of it,now am 17 nd we still love eachother the same..and plan to disclose the secret to our family as i bcom 18 nd eligible for it and get engaged next year…

(Screen) Name: **love**

hi my name is katelyn and im in love. but im in love with a guy way older than me. hes 22. and im well 15. he loves me to. and i think he loves me more sometimes. but he always asks me how are we going to work with this. i always say i dont know. but we find a way to work things out. i really love him and he loves me. but i know that we can make it. if are love is strough anoff we will make it and if not then i guess it just wasent ment to be. i just hope we will grow up and start a family together. i love you ray.

(Screen) Name: katelyn

It all started when I was 6 years old. While I was playing outside on my farm in California, I met a boy. He was an average kind of boy who teased you and then you chased them and beat them up. After that first meeting in which I beat him up we kept on meeting and beating each other up at the fence. That only lasted for a little while though.

We would meet at the fence all the time and we were always together. I would tell him all my secrets. He was quite very quiet he would just listen to what I had to say. I found him easy to talk to and I could talk to him about everything. In school we had separate friends but when we got home we would always talk about what happened in school.

One day I said to him that a guy I liked hurt me and broke my heart. He
just comforted me and said everything would be okay. He gave me words of encouragement and helped me get over him. I was happy and thought of him as a real friend. But I knew that there was something else about him that I liked. I thought of it that night and figured it was just a friend kinda thing that I was feeling.

All through high school and even through graduation we were always together and of course I thought of it as being friends. But I knew deep inside that I really felt differently. On graduation night even though we had different dates to the prom I wanted to be with him. That night after everybody went home I went to his house and wanted to tell him that I wanted to see him. Well that night was my big chance and all I did was just sit there with him watching the stars and talking about what I was going to do and what he was going to do. I looked into his eyes and listened to him talk about what his dream was. How he wanted to get married and settle down. He said how he wanted to be rich and successful. All I could do was to tell him my dream and cuddle next to him. I went home hurting because I didn’t tell him how I was feeling. I wanted to tell him so bad that I loved him but I was too scared and frightened. I let my feelings go and told myself that someday I would tell him just how I felt.

All through college I wanted to tell him but he always had someone with
him. After graduation he got a job in New York I was happy for him but at the same time I was sad to see him go. I was sad also because I didn’t tell him how I felt. But I couldn’t let him know now that he was leaving for his big job. So I just kept it to myself and watched him go on the plane. I cried as I hugged him for what I felt was going to be the last time. I went home that night and cried my eyes out. I felt hurt that I didn’t tell him what I had inside my heart.

Well, I got a job as a secretary and then worked my way to a computer
analyst. I was proud of what I had accomplished. One day I got a letter
with an invitation to a marriage. It was from him, I was happy and sad at the same time. Now I know that I could never be with him and that we could only be friends. I went to the wedding the next month. It was a big occasion. The big church wedding and the reception at the hotel. I met the bride and of course him. I fell in love one more time. But I held back so it wouldn’t spoil what should be the happiest day in his life. I tried to have fun that night but it was killing me inside watching him being so happy and me trying to be happy covering up my sadness and tears inside of me.

I left New York feeling that I did the right thing. Before I left on the flight, he came running out of nowhere and said his good-byes and how he was very happy to see me. I came home and just tried to forget about what went on in New York. I had to go on with my life.

As the years went on we wrote to each other on what was going on and how he had missed talking to me. On one occasion he never wrote back to me at all. I was getting worried as to why he hadn’t written anything for a long time after I had already written 6 letters to him. Well, just when everything seemed hopeless and sad in my life, I got a note that said meet me at the fence where we used to talk about things.

I went and saw him there. I was happy to see him, but he was broken hearted and sad inside. We hugged until we couldn’t breathe anymore. Then he told me about the divorce and why he hadn’t written for a long time. He cried until he couldn’t cry anymore. Finally, we went back to the house and talked and laughed about what I had been going and to catch up on old times. But in all of this I couldn’t tell him how I felt about him.

In the days that followed he had fun and forgot about all his problems and his divorce. I fell in love again with him. When it came time for him to leave back to New York, I went to see him off and cried. I hated to see him leave. He promised to see me every time he could get a vacation. I couldn’t wait for him to come so I could be with him. We would always have fun when we were together.

One day he didn’t show up like he said he would. I figured that he might have been busy. The days turned into months and I just forgot about it.

Then I got a call one day from a Lawyer in New York. The Lawyer said that he had died in a car accident going to the airport. And that it took this long till everything was settled. It broke my heart. I was shocked about what took place. Now I knew why he didn’t come that day. Again, I was broken hearted. I cried that night, cried tears of sadness and heartache. Asking questions why did this happen to a kind guy like him?

I gathered my things and went to New York for the reading of his will. Of course, things were given to his family and his ex-wife. I finally got to meet her since the last time we met at the wedding. She explained to me how he was and how he always provided. But he was always unhappy. She would always try everything but she couldn’t get him happy, as he was that night at their wedding.

When the will was read, the one thing that was given to me was a diary. It was a dairy that of his life. I cried as it was given to me. I didn’t know what to think. Why was this given to me?

I took it and flew back to California. As I flew on the plane I remembered the good times that we had together. I started reading the diary and what was written.

The diary was started the day we first met. I read on till I started to cry. The diary told of him saying that he had fallen in love with me that day I was broken hearted. But he was too afraid to tell me what he had felt. That is why he was so quiet and liked to listen to me. It told of how he wanted to tell me so many times but was too afraid to say anything. It told of when he went to New York and fell in love with another. How the happiest time he had was seeing me and dancing with me at the wedding. He said he imagined it was our wedding. How he was always unhappy till he had no choice but to divorce his wife. How the best time in his life was to read the letters written to him by me. Finally, the diary ended when it said “today I will tell her I love her”. It was the day he was killed.

The day I was going to finally find out what was really in his heart.

(Screen) Name: jason

i was at school when i met teddy he is so cool and i like him so much he so totally my dream crush but i dont thik he likes me until he asked me to go to the prom with him im so in love…………

(Screen) Name: liana

This is an extreme May-December affair, playing in my thoughts. I am middle age and he is quarter of a century. I felt nothing when I saw this boy. Yes literally he is. But we are classmates in graduate school. As days went by, he is there in class but sometimes I even forget that he exists. Then something odd happened. I failed in one of this Math subjects. I felt the world falling in on me, as this means an extension of 6 months more and the comprehensive exams available year next yet. I am single and feeling alone in this big metropolis. I miss my only niece. The best times I had lately in my life is spending quality time with her, either at play, study, or simply going to the mall or park nearby, back home. While still absorbing the shock of failing, and trying to walk my way to the boarding house, my tears are beginning to fall and my vision blurred. Then I met him, this boy. Without asking anything he knew what I’m crying about and started consoling me. I didn’t hear anything he said, but instead asked him to have lunch with me. He refused and told me he failed too. Sensing that we are both in distress I did not insist and proceeded to go home. The next day, I attended class in a minor subject. My resolve then was to continue and do good with my other subjects. I saw this boy again, and after class asked me that we eat at a nearby mall. As I have other things in mind, I replied he has to wait until about 6:00 P.M.as I would still queue to pay for my credit card at the nearest bank. It was already past 6:00 P.M. when I finished my transaction and has all forgotten about his invitation. While waiting for a cab home, my mobile phone rang and saw his name and I was jolted upon remembering that I have a date with him. So I hurried up to meet him at an average diners place inside the mall. There, we began talking and sharing our plans. It was a good unloading session and I felt light. He asked for my YM addy and email ad. I still felt nothing for him except that I was able to unburden some of my thoughts regarding our office’s impractical way of putting me in a sort of exile by sending me to graduate school. Since then, I noticed he has changed. He would always take the time to go near me and every time I am online, he would just pop up and we begin to converse like we are long lost friends. I am beginning to appreciate his trend of thoughts and wondered how deceiving his looks and build can be. So young, his ideas and visions are so matured. I cannot imagine I am actually taking to a 25 years old! With body built that of a still going into a full matured male,he walks with a sure stance and gait like that of a person always in a hurry and wanted to waste no time. His hair locks are long flowing to his nape and curled at the end, they look like they need shampooing very badly. But it gives an aura of male magnetism, I am beginning to get attracted to him. I’m not sure if this is because I am feeling alone, but really his image is beginning to stick into my thoughts. Meanwhile, he maintained being friendly, and would even bring some drinks knowing that I am diabetic. At times he would volunteer to buy me lunch, as I am one who finds walking into the canteen an ordeal because it is hot walking on that asphalt road leading there and falling in line for food is a task. Our chatting has become regular and I’m really beginning to fell close and fall for him. He treated me like I’m the most beautiful creature that ever walked this earth and his patronizing me in his reports made me feel so uncomfortable, our classmates are beginning to tease him which he didn’t mind at all. I realized that I am beginning to feel as if he owns me. And it made me feel so ambivalent. As a woman, he acted like a love struck man and no full blooded woman can ever resist enjoying this kind of attention. On the other hand, I feel so guilty for feeling so, knowing that this would take me nowhere except being left dumped somewhere when the academic year is over. I am beginning to avoid him, and has since then never ever gone out dining or even taking some light snacks with him. I always find ways to avoid him and not even taking a look into his direction. But this didn’t work. The more I avoided him, the more he finds ways to get near. I am always uncomfortable when he is around but tried to act cool and collected even if I feel my heart is beating so fast. And all of this at 50 years old!!!? Until this writing he is still very much around. One time in his offline, he commented that he felt I am always on a detached mode. I find valid excuses like I’m busy doing my class reports, which are true. But the real truth is, I feel he is now beginning to read my mind and heart. And I feel he is playing with my emotions and I look so vulnerable. On the other hand, I can feel his masculinity. The man in a boy’s body wanting the essence of female energy in his life. I am really holding on to my wits. Which makes it doubly difficult because trying to hold back strong emotions can be heart wrenching and causes insomnia. But the feeling that I am 50 y.o. always prevails even if at the moment my heart is acting like it has just experience the pangs of being in love and being appreciated by the opposite sex. That is why I am calling this piece a clouded guilt trip. Yes I want him and I want to love him so badly. But he thought that I am old enough to be his mother is holding me back.Until now, I find comfort in staying away from him. But each moment is a torture thinking about him. I can only wish this is all over now and live a full normal life again.

(Screen) Name: merry_me88

First of all, I know this story is gonna be very long..but at least please try to read my story so you can get some ideas about soul mates and secret love. Enjoy reading!

I remember this guy back when we’re still in fourth grade let’s call him in the name of Mr.Genius (coz his very good in Math). So my story goes like this.

First day of school, I meet my old friends and some new classmates. Our class adviser decided to arrange our seats. He seats in front of me. We still don’t know each other that time.

The second day, the teacher told us to get 10 sheets of pad paper for our penmanship folder, then the guy seating in front of me offered to give me ten sheets of pad paper, he was kinda friendly to me, but I said no thanks coz I have my own. The next few days, he was friendly to me and we talked to each other, get to know more about each other, and I noticed that when I arrive at school he was there talking with his guy friends and when he saw me arrive, he suddenly will go to his seat. These time I was thinking that this Mr. Genius guy likes me because I saw some obvious signs where in a guy is doing when he likes a girl. But, that time I wasn’t that into things like crushes or simply boyfriends thingy. That time I already knew that Mr.Genius likes me, so I was thinking of a way so he would not like me anymore, then I start to be rude to him, and I start to avoid him. One time when we were having our Chinese calligraphy class, he’s jacket was placed at the back of his chair. Then suddenly I accidentally brushed my Chinese brush onto his jacket, leaving a big black mark on his jacket. I’m so shocked and don’t know what to do, because I know if he found out he’ll be mad at me. So I decided to just sit quietly and continue writing. Later he found out, then he asked me if I was the one who did that, I said it wasn’t me, because I was afraid to tell him. Then he got mad at me and told his friends about it. The first quarter has ended and the teacher again decided to change our seat plan, this time it was me who was seating in front of him. It was like every time if the teacher is going to change our seat plan, he is always near me. That time when I accidentally put Chinese ink into his jacket, from then on don’t talk to each other anymore, few weeks past, we began to develop shyness between the two of us. Every time I’m gonna pass near him, I noticed that he is trying to avoid me.

When we were in fifth grade, I don’t know what was happening to me, but soon I just realized that I have feelings for him (It’s just really weird), so that time I don’t know what I was doing, I black texted him, and in one of our text he asked me if I was interested in him and I said I was..(I don’t know what I’m doing that time, right know I’m thinking back that time were I confessed to him that I like him, It makes me feel that I’m totally a foolish girl.) But soon he knew that it was me and I was so ashamed, don’t know what to do because he is telling his friends that I confessed to him that I like him.

By the way, his friend’s brother and my brother know each other and they were both friends, so it means Mr.Genius Guy knows my brother and my brother knew everything that I was doing, and I felt very ashamed. I just wish I didn’t do that anymore.

When we were in sixth grade, Mr.Genius guy has a crush on a girl. Just so you know, Mr.Genius guy is a playboy.

This Mr.Genius guy has a friend, and his friend has a crush on my friend. His friend knew that I like Mr.Genius. So his friend told me that if I would agree to spy on my friend and he to will spy on Mr.Genius and tell me more about him. Then I agreed. He asked Mr.Genius if he is still interested in me, and Mr.Genius guy said that he has liked me back when we were still in fourth grade until now (sixth grade) (that time he likes a girl, me and genius guy are not classmates anymore in sixth grade.)

When there is a batch program or when I’m walking at the hallways or at the corridors, sometimes we cross pass each other and I saw that he stares at me and suddenly look back, he is totally shy too. We haven’t talk for almost 2 and a half yrs. already because we were not classmates. And it’s almost our graduation so I decided to ask him if I could have his graduation pic, he was really shy, and I notice him blushing, and he said yes.
I’m just wondering why is that, if he likes someone at the school, he asks the girl if she can be his girlfriend, but he has a crush on me too, but why is that he is too shy and doesn’t do the same thing to me like what he does to the other girls he like.

Now, that I’m a freshmen, sometimes we cross pass each other and sometimes he look at my eyes so deeply, like he wants to say something, we try to act normal to each other. Sometimes I realize that my fate is testing me, because often we saw each other in the same places. And until now I still has a crush on him, even though he has hurt me a lot of times, I keep on telling myself that I’m not gonna like this person anymore and I’m gonna forget him already, but this feeling I have for him still does not fade away and keeps coming back. I still have this one question on my mind..Does he still like me?

Feel free to post comments:)

(Screen) Name: Hollywo0dPrinc3ss

To tell you my story I have to tell how emotionally well I was in middle school. You could’ve said I was foolish but now that I look back I just think I was very innocent. Listening to the same music and hearing the same dirty jokes and poisonous rumors as the rest of my class I thought I wasn’t really innocent but sometimes you never know what you have until you lose it.
I was in the library when I met a guy online and we talked about books and other things. I was interested in a lot of things and we had a really nice chat. But it was the library and the books eventually led me into another dimension and I forgot about him. Around two weeks later I meet him online, well…he tracks me down. He flatters me by telling me I’m the sweetest thing he ever met. He fed me line after line. He told me he would break up with his online girlfriend for me. Apparently they were about to get married (online) you can do that and he suddenly told her it was over. Oh! But of course I agreed because what other guy wanted anything to do with me? We got together and it was bliss and endless chats about what I was interested in. Then he surprised me. He asked me if I wanted to cyber and I balked. NO WAY. I told him. He pressed the issue though and started to type disgusting things. They filled the screen. They filled my LIFE. I thought this was my Prince who was only requesting a small privelage so I eventually gave in and we did it once. It was only two months later that I realized how precious my single bliss was but I decided to tough it out for him. Then someone told me he cheated on me. CHEATED?! How could he? I gave him my precious gift of innocence and I had been with him a way no one else had. Cruel! So cruel! I shouted at him (by this time we traded adresses and phone numbers) I sobbed softly and begged him not to go. I loved him, it was true. My love was real for me and I thought he felt what I felt. A light grew in my face and I floated on a cloud while at the same time the truth that he was scoundrel drifted in the back of my brain. At the end of the first year and more cybering and cheating on his part I was begging him to set me free. He had too much of my heart for me to force my will over his. I wanted to leave before he could get more ugly. Wait! Don’t go from this sad story so far, this is only the prologue. It’s a nice ending really.
Anyway, he abused me for 3 years because I let him before he broke my heart and threw me out. He broke up with me then told me he had fantasies of killing me then raping my corpse. The next week he asked me to go out with him again to be one with him. He was a monster and I told him so. Then he threatened to kill himself. I loved him still, reader. My love still saw that nice boy who would talk to me and respect me. Sobbing, I forwarded our chats to his Mom. The ones about suicide I made a point of re-sending. The day after taht he called me and told me I was heartless and told me to go to hell and that they might put him in a mental institution thanks to me. I told him I loved the boy who I met and he wasn’t it and reminded him who broke up with whom. He got angry and silent. The next week his friend tells me he heard my ex commit suicide. I scream and cry and remember the nice boy all over again because I’m very loyal so I call his house and ask his Mom how he died and his Mom says he didn’t die. She gets angry the more I tell her my story but not at me, at him.
Dear reader I felt like a hollow shell. A piece of floating garbage. Since he won’t ever come back into my story I’ll tell you what happened to that man. That boy in a man’s body. I saw that he had a web page up on facebook and youtube and what was scary was he had bought a webcam. He took pictures of his face but I know that that was not all he took pictures of, I know that he hasn’t stopped cybering since we broke up. I know that one day the cops will arrest him for corrupting a minor like he corrupted me. It was 10th grade that I was set free like a bird. So happy! and yet so bitter. When my guy friends talked to me I hated them if they looked like HIM that day. I hated them for using the word ‘literally’ like he did. I hated them when they looked too long at me. I hated them when they ignored me. I HATED them period. I told all my friends about the evils of men and stopped going on the computer. Whenever I did and whenever I accidentally went on a chat I got panic attacks because it reminded me of my time being in a cage. I hate hate hate cages. In History class I had surges of memory and my mind couldn’t concentrate on debates. My eyes, oh it was so sad, my eyes would empty of my innate spunkiness and they would resemble a cows. They were dumb and blank. I remember seeing them in a mirror. Then I began to want to kick people or randomly strike out. My anger was like a tumor. You could see the symptoms and it would have ruptured if I didn’t talk about it and take pills. I took passion flower. Little brown pills that calmed me down and help me process my emotions. My family moved into a little quiet home backed by woods and the sounds of birds. I would lie on my bed and listen to the free birds. I whispered to God one time while looking out the window, “I would like a little wind.” And a gust came and blew my hair back. I knew I could heal once I was in this place. I could grow. Oh. I could last in the silence. I meditated in my own way by reading and thinking, reading and thinking, reading and thinking. I realized my anger and I still had sexual thoughts and angry thoughts and bitter thoughts left over but I never once burdened anybody more than my counselor. Her, I only told her an outline of my stresses without letting her plumb the depths because she was innocent it showed in her eyes. And I learned that if you love someone you should never burden them. With my personality sucked out I sat on my quiet bus and savored the peace. The little kids were like bright birds flocking around me and telling me they liked me because I was kind. I never really wanted to hurt those kids I wanted to hurt that man but my hands couldn’t reach him so I projected my anger at people and objects. There were two other highschoolers on the bus. One asian kid a grade ahead and a tsunder indian wrapped in her native hujab and a grade lower. We would sit in a row with one seat to ourselves because it was so spacious and peaceful and just talk. Sam the asian got kids to believe his name was Franklin Benjamin the first couple weeks of school. He also forgot my name as well. It would annoy me so I would reply with bogus answers every time he asked. So annoying, always chattering nonsense. Ziba the indian was cool-headed and fun to talk to. I can only describe it as the type of fun I got when I read a good book. On and off the bus I went, tasting my freedom. Slowly I recovered. At school I was the same with my friends. I never let them in too deep and I show them a kind face because I love them. One day Sam picked up something on the bus and I was reading. He turned in his seat which was in front of mine and held up a dirty candy. “I’ll pay you three quarters to eat it.” Were we in kindergarten? No. So I nod my head and say “Gimme the money.” He hands it over and I stuff it in my pocket. Then I start to read my book. “You said you’d eat it!” He ejaculates. I smirk. “No, I just shook my head and demanded money.” His face contracted into an open faced pout. I could only stare. It was so honest and cute. Then I realized how ridiculous I sounded so I gave his money back and read my book. He was so annoying.My thoughts returned but I never stopped fighting. All throughout 10th grade I never stopped fighting. I was so thankful for a lot of thinks like my parents living together again and my being single. I loved it. God helped too. I read a lot of Proverbs and Ecclesiastes because it told me straight what I needed to do to improve.
“Are you going to the prom?” I shook my head no. “Well I’m going with Lyla Steward.” “That’s nice.” I reply smiling. Sam makes a pained face. Lyla is like a Neurotic A-Type and she’s covered in 300 pounds of extra fat. “There’s not a lot of studs in 11th grade. How about you. Hey. Dano. What about Tristan?” Tristan in my grade is the creepy stalker type. Like HIM I suspected. “If you like the weird and boring.” I reply. “Wow. Ice Queen. Gabs’s an Ice Queen.” He called me Gabs. A contraction of my full name. I blush because I feel like that’s a compliment. I saw respect in his eyes. Oh, I craved respect…Nevermind what does he know. I read again. I make a point to ignore him a lot but we end up chatting. Silently. He starts reading life, the universe, and everything and since I have to read it for a book list I read it. He glances at me and something has begun. I don’t know what. He reads Douglas Adams (the author) then I read him and then he does and then I do. Finally we chat about him and the books and we sit close. I realize that people could misconstrue us for liking each other and since if we were Josh wouldn’t know he was getting a hollow horrid girl so I keep away. But the kids on the bus tease us especially the middle schoolers who secretly like Sam. How could they like that vain show pony? He had perfect hair and was obsessed over his teeth. Who would like that thing? Then Sam starts making jokes. “Yes! Gabs fell in love with me and I with her. Oh tell them honey, tell them about how we met.” I leap in. “Well He was Tall.” I glance at him nodding. “His hair was Dark. And..” I lean in. “He was ASIAN! OH! It was like a horror movie! but as you can see I got over his deformities.” I had nothing against asians except him because he was ridiculous and he was shocked and pouting and I couldn’t help it. I giggled lightly. Smiling like I hadn’t. Then I put my hands over my mouth and went back to reading but I’m sure my eyes had come back again and didn’t look dumb for that second. Another time I was telling him about how I hated a certain boy for ruining my one favorite book. “He scribbled all over every page for no reason. I cried. I hate him. And if you ever tell I’ll never speak to you again.” At the bus stop where we all (the whole school) at the end of the day I heard an “ahem” behind me. I turn and Sam is standing with the hated boy. “He want’s to tell you something.” Sam gestures to the hated boy. “I’m…soooory”. He sneers. Then something unexpectedly happens. Sam who happens to be a pacifist punches him in the stomach. “You have to mean it!” The mean guy sobers up “I’m sorry.” He says honestly. “Say for what.” Sam growls. “For ruining your book.” My walls come down or at least some. “Oh!” My eyes shine. “I forgive you.” I manage a smile. Sam grins and I still smile even though it’s Sam, or maybe because it’s Sam.We get onto the bus and I feel a lightness. I sit. Sam sits. “Thank You.” My voice is soft so he brings his ear closer. “Thank You.” He looks at me. I try to frown because I’m embarrassed. “Not that, it was um special.” I sit and we don’t talk.
Another time we’re on the bus and it’s Friday and we’re homebound. “Gabs.” Sam asks. “Should I cut my hair?” I look at him and I feel a devil on my shoulder. I pretend to muse seriously over the question then I nod gravely. “Yeah I think you should cut it all off.” I had a reputation of being honest and also his hair was slightly annoying. Not cute like he must think, I thought. I went home for the weekend and I got on the bus noticing a new kid out of the corner of my eye. Cute, I think. It’s not until we walk into school and I see Sam’s red shoes on the new kid. I look up. It IS SAM. And he, he’s. HIS hair! It’s cut with a little bit longer for bangs. His face is framed and his teeth flash against his hair. I realize then that Sam is handsome. I feel jolted and everyone at school is raving about the cut. The next week I hide from him I’m afraid to show my ugly face to him. Suddenly I want to be pretty but I don’t know how. I put my hair back one day and I go to school. On the bus Sam tries to talk to me but I duck my face and hurry in. My friends give me compliments on face that day though so I look in the mirror and I look changed. My face is soft and kind and my eyes are like brown shiny marbles. My dark hair frames my face and my clothes look comfortable. I talk a lot at the end of the day to Sam. Smiling at his attention I feel like he cant see my ugliness. Afterall I only did this not to burden him. Right? I believe that.
Then my mom and I see a great new house it’s beautiful and I immediately love it. There’s rooms for the three of us but I’ll have to…change buses. It doesn’t bother me but as the time winds down I open more like a flower. I have no idea why I’m so loved even though I’m so mean. I’m so taciturn but I feel my family and friends love and new friendships. One day I get off the bus and mom tells me “We move today!” I forgot. I turn around and wave at Sam desperate. Why? I feel so panicked. He doesn’t notice and the bus leaves. I know we have school together but I don’t feel so hot. We move and I go on a different bus. I don’t tell them until a week later Sam walks up to me in the hall. He’s about to ask me about it I know it! Sure it’s a little late in the game to notice but he did notice. He ponts and laughs, “Ha. Ha The bus missed your stop.” My face deadpans, IMMEDIATELY. I look at him then I push past. It was all in my head. It’s a pill but I swallow it. Four school days later he comes up to me. “So you’re not on the bus anymore.” I stare at him wondering whether I should help him out. I stare until he’s uncomfortable. “Yes,” I reply brusquely, “I moved.” He ducks his head and walks back to where he was standing. I am ANGRY! That’s it. NOT sad. I knew I was a hollow girl like the poem. I knew I never was a good conversationalist. I knew I wasn’t pretty. There are two weeks of 10th grade left and I utterly avoid him for a week. Yet whenever he glimpses me he gives me soft smiles. Maybe even shy. Don’t Do That. I want to tell him. It’s confusing me. I wonder where my bitterness went. Then it hits me it jerks me to a wall. Am I being, a jerk? I concede that Yes, I am. On Monday I ready myself. I look nice and presentable and I walk up to Sam. “I’m Sorry. I was angry at you so I ignored you.” Sam blinks, he is in his class room other people can hear us.”Why?” Sam asks. My hands shake but I clench them. “I was angry.” I grate out. “Yes but what for?” “You didn’t notice when I moved. Ziba noticed and the kids said hi to me. You didn’t though.” He looks a little afraid. Oh, my stomach is quaking. “I’m Sorry,” he says and then “Could it be, that you like me?” I bite my tongue because this is what I wanted all along. but I am still a hollow girl. I remember a girl from my chorus class who told me she liked him. She was very pretty and very good. It showed in her blue eyes. I remember how abused I was and how I learned to always treasure and never burden someone with dead weight. I was dead weight. Sam was a good guy and good guys require good girls. It’s like a match. “No, I never liked you that way.” I smile like he’s so silly. “But now that I’m not angry at you anymore I’ll tell you who likes you. She’s perfect.” “Who?” He believes I can’t lie. “Lindsey Cronelle.” His eyes shine like perfect black pearls. And I nod resolute in this. I walk away because it will sort itself out. 5 days later school ends and I watch Sam leave hand in hand with Lindsey. Since school is over I can say it now. I crouch and put my face in my hands. My eyes are streaming. My palms are wet. “I love you Sam!”
He left the next year and visits our school sometimes. It’s been a year now and I feel strong. So strong now that I can love the right way again. I’m going to move on but I will always treasure my 10th grade year. I feel like I want people to know what love really is. So now that he’ll never read this and I’ve changed every name but his and my nickname I feel like I can be free.

(Screen) Name: Gabrielle

I met this guy in my company and i had a great crush on him for almost a year,and then suddenly a surprise to myself i never knew that i would fall in love with him someday.A year passed and then he proposed me on the 17th Sept 08 and that’s the time he told me those three golden words that said,”I LOVE YOU”,and i was surprised and now that he and me are going to get married in the nearer future i am so happy and i hope we always stay like this forever.i love you a lot sweetheart, thank-you for being there for me when i need you,even knowing for the fact you at times don’t have the time.love you always and love you forever.

(Screen) Name: Jolana