I want to share you about my experience. I’m just a 17 years old girl that not interest with love stuff. I always thought that having a boyfriend while i’m studying wasn’t good at all. I wanted to focus more on studying. But until i met him. We met each-other on a social communication. I never got interest of guys who try to flirt with me. But the moment that he talked to me. I was so attracted to him. We talked to each-other every night because i was on my holiday break. Later, about half of a month, he confessed me. I didn’t reply first because i wanted to think more about this. A few days later, i replied him. I thought over it again and again. Do i love him?
Then i got my answer. I liked him. Every minute we talked to each-other make me happy so much. At first, we were totally in deep love or maybe just only my thought. He always told me that he want to marry me. At first, i ignored that because we are just online-dating. We were world apart from each-other. He won’t make his way to come and get me. But he always told me he how much he want to marry me almost everyday. He always gave me a little hope of being with him. I’m sure he wasn’t serious with me. He rarely shared his little stories with me. I disappointed at first then i think that maybe because he is a guy. Guys usually don’t share problem, right?
But i was wrong. I saw most of the guy share their problem and stories with their girlfriend. I was so upset. I couldn’t even focus on my lesson. I always skipped school and excuse myself that i’m feeling unwell. But thinking for a few days, i could not run away from the problem. I had to face it.
Then when the night come, i talked to him and asked him about it. And i found something. He was talking with other girls while he was in relationship with me too. When i asked him about that, he was totally mad at me. Then he asked for breaking up. I agreed at first but then i always missed him. I couldn’t take it. I was so deep in love with him. I asked him to be back again. Then he said ok. I was so happy at the time he said so.
But not as i expected, he changed day by day. He usually asked for break up even it was such a small things. I forgave him for countless times but he never think about it. I just put at the fault on myself because i thought that i’m so dumb.
I found lots of things that he hide from me. I felt so stupid because i loved him so much.
I’m not sure what i do is right or wrong. I’m really confuse now.