He had sex with someone else and it was better than me! Help

[his1&only]

My boyfriend and I have a very close relationship but unfortunatley we broke up about two years ago and we both did our own thing...we ended up back together and anything I did with another guy was a BIG deal to him and I had to tell him what happened word for word touch for touch..and there wasnt much to say ( I didnt sleep or oral with anyone) well we're talking the other night and he admits to me he slept with someone when we were broke up and "not in these words" he explains it was "good" so I freak and i start to pound him for ?'s like he used to do to me and after a few nights of digging I find out it was the best he ever had, she had 3 o's, she did things I had never done...long story short this HURTS...the man i have loved for 7 years sleeps with a little hoe and she sweeps him off his feet. He came back to me but how shoud i cope with this...& the BIG ?...how can I be better? Since he told me all of this everytime we have sex it just feels like everything I do is trying to copy her and that's just &*&^%^ up. What can I do to be "better" & how should I feel about him doing this to begin with and then hiding it on top of all that!!?

[abetterus]

Sounds like you both had your fun...but....he shouldn't be telling you someone else is better than you...at least not over and over! I'm not sure his heart or head is where it should be. If you gunna stay together then you both need to put it ALL behind you..no more questions! Sorry to be so blunt...but you ask..
www.abetterus.com

[his1&only]

Sounds like you both had your fun...but....he shouldn't be telling you someone else is better than you...at least not over and over! I'm not sure his heart or head is where it should be. If you gunna stay together then you both need to put it ALL behind you..no more questions! Sorry to be so blunt...but you ask..
www.abetterus.com

And you're absolutely right. He shouldn’t tell me these things but I have this sick feeling like there's more and I need to know everything. I feel I wouldn’t be like that if he hadn’t been that way with me. I am talking about serious chit I’ve gone though because he would get upset and have to know EVERYTHING so I suppose I feel it's only right for me to give him some chit and make him understand what I went through. Also I feel as if I kept sex a sacred thing while we were apart simply for his feelings and it upsets me because he didn’t have the same courtesy. But there again we were split up so he had all right.
Hey, thanks again for the reply I do appreciate it and I feel you are 100% right we do need to just put this behind us if we are going to make it work. The part I am having the most trouble with is the fact that she did more for him...with that being said my goal is to do whatever it takes to out-do that experience he had with her. I'm not sure if those feelings are normal but I think that is the only way to put my mind at ease. It's just hard to compete with a one-night stand but ima try
THANKS AGAIN!!!

[iminlovewitha...]

First off did you say you were apart again ?

I think the best think you can do , assuming your together and trying to work it out... is forget about what happened with them. Explore your self as u explore him. Rather then trying to fit the sluts mold..... try to break him out . Teach him something new, about him self. You cant be trying to recreate an experiance he had. But you can make it less important by folowing your own instincts , and exploring , uninhibited , and rock his world. She did something you didnt. thats why your frustrated.... you wont do that to her by trying to do what she did.

[his1&only]

First off did you say you were apart again ?

I think the best think you can do , assuming your together and trying to work it out... is forget about what happened with them. Explore your self as u explore him. Rather then trying to fit the sluts mold..... try to break him out . Teach him something new, about him self. You cant be trying to recreate an experiance he had. But you can make it less important by folowing your own instincts , and exploring , uninhibited , and rock his world. She did something you didnt. thats why your frustrated.... you wont do that to her by trying to do what she did.

Great Advice! I agree with you 100%. Yes, we are together now and trying to work everything out...it's just very hard to cope with the fact that he did this and it was a more enjoyable experience than anything we've ever had. And yes I am frustrated because I had all the chances to rock his world prior to her and i wouldnt be going through this, but I never was really into sex so she got the golden ticket of being the first to "REALLY" rock his world...and that makes me so angry I could cry!! But yer right i need to get over it and try to pull some tricks outta the old hat I just don't really LOVE sex so it's hard to be kinky when you dont really crave it but i'm trying. Thanks again!!

[jemel2hodge]

I agree with the first comment and I also disagree.For one,did he open himself up to you about his sexual interests and what and how he likes it? Were you open to them and tried them?What about you? Was he fulfilling your desires? Last of all why would he keep telling you someone is better than you? Maybe he needs to be with her. Whats the matter with you trying to do what she does,isnt that what he likes and how he likes it? Why is he trying to stir up jealousy?I always believed that its good to be open to each others desires or else our intersests will wander else where.

[thecounselor]

Tell Him to tell you what you can do to improve in you sex with him, tell him to show you his sex points, the style he likes. and note: sex is not just to satisfy one person. Good sex is meant to satisfy both parties. so tell him where to touch you next time and you too tell him where he needs to touch you so that the both parties will enjoy it well. thanks thecounselor