Having sex is a little like baseball- it can be a hit or miss. You are either going to score a home run or will end up with disappointing results.
When the sex is bad, does it mean you or your sex partner are bad at it? Not necessarily!
Most of us have had our share of bad sexual encounters. We meet someone really attractive and the sexual energies are sparking, only to be disappointed when we actually have sex with them and it was not really all that great- and in fact, pretty awful. Was it you? Was it the other person? It really is a question that cannot be provided with a cookie cutter answer. Each sexual situation is different. However, one thing is for sure every time- and that is if the sex was amazing and unforgettable, it is because both people involved shared a really good connection and enjoy, for the most part, the same style of sexual moves. If you are on the same page of what you consider to be a turn on and it all happens naturally without anyone having to really direct the other on what they want, it is no shocker if the sex is great.
bad bedIf you two have different ideas of what makes a sexual experience good however, it could result in disappointing results, with one or both people not achieving the amazing time and orgasms they were hoping for.
So it all has to do with how you connect with another person sexually. It is not that you are bad or he/she is bad in bed- it’s just that you two value different things in a good sexual experience and feel tuned on by different things and different moves that you did not get enough of, or any of.
Another thing that could play a role in a bad sexual encounter is if one or both of you are nervous and reserved. Sometimes two people who are attracted to each other and flirt heavily and give each other all the obvious signs of wanting to sleep together find themselves suddenly nervous, shy or reserved and not being their complete open selves sexually. This will definitely get in the way of experiencing a satisfying sexual experience. It is important that you feel comfortable enough with the person you want to have sex with, so you can relax and just be your true sexual self without worrying about what someone will think of you or your sexual ways.
So while some of us could probably use some more practice in the sex department, for the most part- none of us are really that bad in bed. It is all about getting together with someone you connect well with and are on the same sex page with.
If you experience bad sex, remember that it is most likely because:
You and/or the other person were nervous or shy and froze up
The two of you were on different pages, expecting certain and different sexual moves that did not really happen to your satisfaction
Or the two of you were not as sexually attracted to each other as you thought. Sometimes two people can connect well and find each other attractive, only to find out they are not sexually attracted to each other.