Every week, Love Expert Alina will give a quick, short answer to common questions asked and submitted to us here at Love-Sessions. Her answers can be read through our E-mail newsletters, or by going to the Alina Answers Page on our website here.
Question: After a few years, my ex now wants me back and swears he has changed, realizes I am “the one” and things will be different if I just give him a chance to prove it. Should I give him another chance or should I leave it?
Answer: You know, it’s always at least a little flattering when an ex comes back into the picture many years later, looking for you, eager for another chance after realizing you were probably “the one”, as your ex has told you. That being said, you should handle this with caution and take baby steps before diving back into anything with him. First thing you need to find out, is why is he looking for you after all this time rather than realizing all this sooner? Did he have some epiphany after being with others that you really were that special, one in a million woman he will never be able to find anywhere? Or did he come out of a bad relationship or marriage that caused him to look back and reminisce on days when things were less complicated and fun- and it happened to be a time when he was dating you? Get to know him again slowly and casually, and find out what is really going on there first. Then, if you are personally feeling something for him again and believe a flame can be reignited, then proceed to casually date, taking it one step at a time- especially if this was a relationship with a rocky, unstable past. Good luck!
Is it Okay to Lie about Your Age?
I am a woman in my early thirties who often gets mistaken as being in my mid-20s. This obviously is a huge confidence boost for me and it also gets me lucky with the younger guys- yum! When they ask me how old I am, I often lie and just tell them I am like 26 or something, since they already assume and guess I am 25 or 26 years old. It’s all in good fun and for me it’s getting that kick out of knowing that I’ve still got it in me to get away with looking younger. Some of my friends tell me I should be honest about it, but I’m just having fun and am not getting serious with any of these guys. Is it okay to lie about your age?
Alright, so- if you are one of the lucky ones out there who often gets mistaken for being younger than your actual age, I guess we can’t hold that against you. So is it okay to lie about your age then, I mean, since people already think you are younger anyway?
We live in a society that worships youth, so it is no wonder that we try to hang on to our youthful looks for as long as possible. Let’s face it- there are many (maybe way too many) white lies swimming around through the social scenes out there, so I highly doubt that you telling a white lie about your age will really do any damage. If you are out having a good time and are already getting a lot of positive attention and compliments, one little white lie isn’t all that bad.
Keep in mind, however, that It also depends on the circumstance. If you are just out with your friends for a night out on the town and are only looking for a good time, then white lie away if it makes you feel good about yourself. If you are out on the social scene with the goal to try and meet potential people to date and get involved it, then it is of course best to be honest about your age. The last thing you want is to give a bad first impression once they find out you lied. For some people it won’t be a big deal, but for others it can be a real turn off.
Also, try not to get too dependent on the whole lying about your age thing, in order to feel good about yourself. It’s okay to do it sometimes for fun and because you can, but you should not feel like you have to sound younger in order to carry yourself with confidence.
So in the end, I’d say- yes…it’s pretty harmless fun to lie about your age, as long as you do it in small doses.