So I fell in love with my ex’s best friend… while we were still in the relationship and before he became ‘the ex’. I was with ‘N’ for eight miserable months: he was a nasty little man and
\nan abusive alcoholic, who at 42 had become so bitter about life, so resentful of anyone else’s happiness, and so filled with hatred that you would have sworn he was an old man who had spent his life in the gutter. Then there was ‘P’… well the fact that he looked like the early Hollywood actor Robert Taylor didn\u2019t hurt \ud83d\ude42 but it was his character and demeanor that really
\ngot me. He was intelligent, educated, cultured, and refined. He spoke to me properly, adult-to-adult the way grown ups should speak to one another. He was respectful, and not in a fawning,
\nfalse way but genuinely respectful – of himself and others. And he was a gentleman\u2026 in truth, he was the very antithesis of \u2018N\u2019 Days, and weeks, and months dragged on and I found myself slowly but surely confronted with the fact that my relationship with \u2018N\u2019 was doomed and had been from the start.
\nI had already become aware that I I was falling in love with \u2018P\u2019 and although I knew such feelings weren\u2019t \u2018right\u2019 I never regretted them: they were what got me through; what made it possible to bear the deep stress of having to walk away from \u2018N\u2019 for my own mental health and general wellbeing. I clung to them and held tight to them as the survivor of a shipwreck does to floating debris, to keep from drowning in turbulent waters.. I cherish them to this day because they \u2018saved\u2019 me from the very real threat of believing the \u2019noise\u2019 coming out of someone else\u2019s mouth that I was useless, worthless, hard to love, a whore, etc, blah blah.
\nThis all happened thirteen years ago now, and I still think about \u2018P\u2019 and still hold the same feelings for him.
\nI NEVER told him how I felt or ever let on to anyone what had happened – to this day he doesn\u2019t know and he never will. I do not need him to: it is enough for me that I know\u2026 that my capacity to actually fall deeply in love with a man at such a crucial point in my life reminded me I was a woman,
\nand helped me be strong enough to break free of an abusive relationship.
\nNow that I am older I have one regret: that I did not drop \u2018N\u2019 like a hot potato the very moment I laid eyes on ‘P’ and pursue him for all that it was worth! But, then my life would have been in danger of a happy ending, and how boring would that have been! \ud83d\ude09<\/p>\n
(Screen) Name<\/b>: RanKuoRen<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
So I fell in love with my ex’s best friend… while we were still in the relationship and before he became ‘the ex’. I was with ‘N’ for eight miserable months: he was a nasty little man and an abusive alcoholic, who at 42 had become so bitter about life, so resentful of anyone else’s […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[9],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.love-sessions.com\/confessions\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1577"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.love-sessions.com\/confessions\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.love-sessions.com\/confessions\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.love-sessions.com\/confessions\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.love-sessions.com\/confessions\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1577"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.love-sessions.com\/confessions\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1577\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1608,"href":"https:\/\/www.love-sessions.com\/confessions\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1577\/revisions\/1608"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.love-sessions.com\/confessions\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1577"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.love-sessions.com\/confessions\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1577"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.love-sessions.com\/confessions\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1577"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}