Knowing when it’s time to let go
A break-up is never an easy experience. Whether a break up is one sided or a mutual decision, it is something that leaves you feeling very emotionally torn. You would think that if you are pretty much over someone and have had it with the relationship, it would be easy to just pick up and leave. Not so easy though, I’m afraid. This is because no matter what problems your relationship has experienced with this person, this is still someone you once felt completely head over heels crazy about at one point, not to mention all the time and emotions that were invested.
This is also why so many couples stay together long after their relationship has run its course. Deep down, they both know it is over, but cannot bring themselves to let go out of fear of facing that emotionally tearing experience. Even if a relationship has turned unhealthy and toxic, it still has become this comfort zone that can be challenging to get out of.
So when do you know it’s time to break up? Honestly, no one will know the answer to this better than you, but since our heads can be clouded with all sorts of thoughts and mind games, here is a little guide of when it is probably time to let go…
- One or both of you stop caring– As unpleasant as arguments and fights can be, they are still a good sign that indicates you both still care enough to fight for your relationship. However, if you or your partner (or both of you) find yourself feeling numb emotionally with no desire to even fight or argue anymore, then the flame of your relationship has probably burned out.
- You Fight too much and constantly– That being said (in reference to above), if you two are fighting too much and too often without willing to really work as team in getting that under control, then it probably is best to break up, because even during fights, you two should be able to work together and negotiate to a certain degree.
- The Sexual Connection is Gone– While sex is not the only important part of a relationship, if it is lacking- it becomes a huge problem that can really tear you two apart. A relationship is made up of both an emotional and sexual connection, so if you lose your sexual connection, the passion fizzles and you find yourselves having less and less sex with little excitement when you do have it, then it is a sign of trouble in your paradise.
- Side Note: Keep in mind that it is not uncommon for couples to get stuck in a sexual rut or lose their way. If this is your only relationship issue, work together in seeing if you can revive it first, before throwing in the toweYou Become Too Emotionally Dependent on Each
- Other– Obviously, when you are in a relationship, you are going to grow dependent on each other emotionally to a certain degree. This is normal and great- it is a wonderful feeling to know that someone needs you and that you need them, knowing that he or she is there for you. Being emotionally attached and being too emotionally dependent and needy are two different things though and if you find yourselves feeling like you really cannot function well emotionally without the other, perhaps it is time to take a break. Perhaps a full blown break up is not necessary, but time apart is certainly suggested at this point. If you cannot feel happy, secure and strong being on your own, then you cannot be a healthy influence on each other. Remember- you are supposed to share your lives together out of choice and desire, not because of need or as a way to fill in any of your personal empty gaps.