Last Year I met this really great guy on facebook:, sweet,cute,smart,soft spoken and my age. We started talking online and then we exchanged phone nuumbers. The conversations were great ,I still remember the firtst time i heard his voice, I told him i was busy and he needed to call back ,he did and we spoke for months; we would talk all night it was amazing.

When we finially decided to meet i stood him up.I did not think he would show,but he did! He waited three hours and then had fifteen beers trying to figure out why i did that, truth be told i was already inlove with him and i was scared to death.
A week later we did meet and i still remember his smile, he blushed when he sat down to talk to me, we knew then that what we had was real .He kissed me that day. It was my worst and best kiss, it was bad because he kissed me whle i was turning my head so our lips did not quite meet properly but it had a spark to it i had neve submitted myself like that before.
But the downside was he lived far away 4hours away, we saw soo little of each other, but we tried, we really did.
The first time we made love we went to a hotel , we wanted time alone with each other , we did not even want to have sex but once we were alone , it was like having fire works going of in every part of your body, like goose bumps in your heart.He took me to heaven, it was more than sex, I did not just want his body I wanted his heartand soul.
I still remember how GOOD he felt inside me , it was like we were made to fit each other. I wish I could explain, like Kissing fire, but in a good way, it was every thing i wanted in one steamy package, he was giving me his passion , his desire, his lust and love.
I can close my eveys now and still feel his moist skin and rippling muscels and how he smelt and tasted, it was the best i have ever had really.
Sadly we did not last, lack of time together finially took it toll on the relationship and he told me he was not ready for a serious relationship , we started off as ending as friends but two weeks later i saw his relationship status on facebook change from single to in a relationship with someone else…
We argued and he said it was just for kicks but i did not believe him I was soo hurt.
We stopped talking for a while and only started speakingnot too recently , by then he was singel and i was in a relationship with my current boyfriend he great , but he’s not him.
The thing is I love him still. I know its not fair to my current boyfriend.
But there’s is another complication, when he asked me if I was in relationship , I said yes and that if he really believed we would get back together.
Why did i say that?
Now he has a new much younger Girlfriend. She still has “teen” attached to her age. He seems happy, and I tell him I am happy that he’s happy. Truth is I am not.
I am trying to save the current relationship I have. Which is not my boyfriends fault, because he loves me without question, i am the one that wants out, like I said he’s not him and my boyfriend is trying to please me. but i stay and suck it up just so my ex can see that I am happy without him . Well at least make it look that way.
I can’t beging to tell you how seeing her with him kills me.
We still joke alot and talk but as friends.
I want to tell him I love him still, I want him back soo bad, but I am soo afarid that he is over me and I would get shoot down, and I do feel guilty about the feelings my current boyfriend has for me,I feel bad I can’t return it, he wants to marry me, and I want to be with another man, who mostly likely does not want me.
So I keep fake smiling and wishing him all the best, and when I am alone at night I will go through my phone and as Sad as it soundes kiss his picture and wish he was still mines.

(Screen) Name: telli