To Marry or...
Getting married is
once in a lifetime decision for many people. When people wish to get married,
invariably all of them expect a full life together. Very few would think of
marriage as a short-term exercise. Hence, it is very much necessary that all
aspects of a life together be fully analyzed before tying the knot. Usually men
and women tend to have different perspectives about married life. It would be
better to have open and honest discussion to sort out the possible future
irritants or at least understand them so that some sort of compromise could be
The reasons that a
man looks at while desiring to marry her are innumerous. However, a few of them
top the list in order of priority. For most men, the need of a woman in life is
necessitated by the motherly love that he had received in his early life. He
needs a woman who can show him the same love and who could fulfill his physical
and emotional needs. That is why many men look for the same qualities in a woman
that their mothers possess. The second reason is to have a lifetime companion,
who can share his desires and needs. The third reason is love. When a man feels
that he loves a particular woman, he wants to own her fully. This might appear
to be a wrong reason but that is the way humans are made. Everybody likes to
possess what he or she desires and human relationships are no different. In some
cases, the man might marry a woman because she has become pregnant and is
carrying his child. Certain men wish to marry a woman who is having the same
career as his, so that they would be able to adapt to each other better. It is
quite usual for a doctor to marry a doctor and a lawyer to marry a lawyer. They
would be able to understand the work pattern and the workload of each other.
However, few others are very particular that the woman is having a different
profession, so that their interests do not clash. This choice depends on the
outlook of the individual.
In short men marry women for
the following main reasons.
The wish to
continue the motherly love received in childhood.
Desire to have a
The love the man
has for the woman.
The woman having
become pregnant by him.
To have a woman
who has a similar career for easier adaptability.
Women also marry
men for nearly the same reasons. However, one important reason that women have
in marriage is to escape from parents that they do not like or from a parent who
is abusive. Sometimes, men also marry for this reason but the number is much
lesser than women. So the reasons for a woman marrying a man can be
enumerated as follows.
Wish to escape
Desire to have a
Love for the man.
pregnant by the man.
To have a man
having a similar career for easier adaptability.
The reasons for
getting married are quite obvious. On the other hand, the reasons for not
getting married are much more complicated. In fact, it would be difficult to
mention reasons for not getting married. However, the reasons for a marriage
becoming a failure could be discussed with more ease. There are several jokes
about marriage but nearly all of them are at the expense of the woman. There
should be some strong reasons for that. Probably, the main reasons are the
innumerable needs that women have that drain the purse of a man and the
continuous nagging that women indulge in after marriage. One joke says that a
successful man is one who can make more money than his wife spends but a
successful woman is one who finds such a man. Many women tend to nag the men too
much after marriage. They try to compare their husbands with other men who are
more successful in life, which is resented by the husbands. Wives also tend to
give free advice to men as to what they should and should not do, which is also
not liked by many men.
Infidelity is one
more reason that could harm the institution of marriage. Both men and women, who
are quite possessive, would be repelled when they come to know about
extra-marital relationships, leading to separation. Physical incompatibility is
the cause for break-up in several cases. Even loss of interest in sexual
relationship after some time could lead to a break-up of the marriage. Finally,
the conflict in tastes and interests that appeared insignificant before the
marriage starts to take a larger picture in married life. Disagreements
increase, resulting in final separation.
Even though it would look
absurd if we list reasons for not getting married, we could list the reasons
that break-up marriage.
the wife and living beyond the man his income
nagging, comparing the man to others more successful, and giving unwarranted
incompatibility or sharp decrease in sexual interest
tastes and interests leading to disagreements and fight