WELL HELLO AGAIN I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THE FIRST PART, IT WAS NICE RIGHT? WELL AS I WAS TYPING ……NOW WE WERE AT THE PARKSIDE INN IN HEMET CA ON FLORIDA AVE IN ROOM 211. THE WEATHER OUTSIDE WAS BRIGHT, BREZZY AND WARM , IT WAS NICE, BUT TO WORK I HAD TO GO, AS I WALKED UP THE STREET LOOKING FOR SOMEONE LOOKING FOR ME? I STARTED THINKING ABOUT THIS MOVE WITH DINO, YOU KNOW JUST HIM AND I MMMMM? I TRUELY HOPE MY GUT FEELINGS ARE WRONG! BECAUSE SOMETHING INSIDE ME IS NOT FEELING THAT THIS MAY HAVE BEEN A GOOD IDEA!
WELL X-MAS WAS COMING AND BETWEEN DINO AND I , THERE WAS 4 KIDS ON HIS SIDE AND 2 ON MINE WELL REALLY ONLY ONE MY DAUGHTER IS A WITNESS AND SHE DOESNT CELEBRATE X-MAS. SO NOW I HAD SET MY MIND TO SOME HOW COME UP WITH ENOUGH MONEY TO GET GIFTS FOR THE KIDS. SO ON X-MAS EVE I GOT THAT MONEY FOR GIFTS I HAD BEEN SEARCHING FOR AND WENT STRAIGHT TO MICHAELS TO GET WHAT I WANTED FOR DINOS DAUGHTER AND MY SON NAMED JEREMY WHO HAD RECENTLY BEEN ADOPTED BY A NICE FAMILY IN LAKEWOOD CA, NEWAYS……….. DINO AND I WENT TO MICHAELS AND PURCHASED TWO WOODEN BOXES SOME PAINT AND STENCILS AND THE THINGS WE WOULD NEED TO MAKE THESE PLAIN OLE WOODEN BOXES INTO SOMETHING WONDERFUL. I WASNT SURE ABOUT DINOS CREATIVENESS , I MEAN I KNEW HE COULD DRAW BUT COULD HE DO A BOX FOR A GIRL? WELL IT TOOK ABOUT 7HRS TO GET THE BOXES COMPLETED BUT TO MY SURPRISES DINO ACTUALLY DID A VERY DETAILED , SHIMMERING, GLITTERING BOX A BEAUTIFUL PINK BOX WITH THE NAME NEVEAH ON IT FOR HIS DAUGHTER, I WAS IMPRESSED , HE REALLY IS A NEATO GUY. SO AS THE DAYS PAST AND THE STRESS INSIDE OF HIM GREW DUE TO HIS ALL OF A SUDDEN LACK OF COMMUNICATION, WHEN THERE REALLY SHOULDN’T HAVE BEEN ANY REASON WHY HE COULDN’T TALK TO ME, WE USED TO TALK ABOUT EVERYTHING , WITH NO PROBLEM AT ALL, BUT IT WASN’T LIKE THAT ANYMORE UNFORTUNATELY. SO NOW EVERY NOW AND THEN THERE WOULD BE AN ARGUEMENT, BUT AS MORE DAYS PAST AND SUSPICION AND CURIOUSITY BEGIN TO TAKE OVER HIM , HE BECAME A VERY DEFENSIVE AND AGGRESSIVE PERSON, NOT LIKE THE GENTLE, ATTENTIVE AND VERY AFFECTIONATE MAN I REMEMBERED 3 MONTHS PRIOR TO THIS, MY FEARS OF HIM AND THE COLD HEARTED WORDS LIKE STEAL THAT HE SPOKE WHENEVER A FIGHT WOULD OCCUR CUT ME DEEP AND I MEAN DEEP, I HAVE NEVER BEEN ABLE TO HANDLE BEING CALLED NAMES OR ANYTHING LIKE BECAUSE OF AN TRAMATIC CONSISTENT INCIDENT THAT OCCURED WHEN I WAS YOUNGER, DINO WOULD SAY SUCH AWFUL THINGS TO ME, WHY?GOD WAS THIS HAPPENING? WHERE DID THIS COME FROM? HOW CAN SOMEONE GO FROM BEING SO PERFECT AND EVIED, TO COLD HEARTED AND HIDDEN INSIDE A WORLD I COULDNT GET INTO? AFTER ABOUT A MONTH AND HALF WENT BY STILL CONFUSED AS TO WHY? THESE BEHAVIORS AND ATTITUDE CAME FROM THE MAN I HAD SO WILLING GAVE MY EVERY PART OF MY PERSON TO, THEN THE NIGHT CAME WHEN AN ARGUEMENT AROSE, AND THIS TIME WORDS ESCALTED AND “SMACK” CAME DINOS HAND ACROSS MY FACE, NOW I SAT IN SHOCK CRYING MY EYES OUT WONDERING WHY? WOULD THE ARMS THAT HELD THE HANDS THAT BROUGHT ME SO MUCH SECURITY AND SAFENESS AND HONESTLY MADE ME FEEL LIKE THAT NOTHING OR NO ONE COULD HARM ME, HAVE DONE JUST THAT MY SAFE HAVEN HAD JUST DEMOLISHED IT , AND MY ANSWER AS TO WHY? WAS NOT EVER TO ME GONNA BE ANSWERED, THEY NEVER ARE. HOW IN THE WORLD GOD DID WE GET HERE? NOW BECAUSE OF THE HARSH COLD HEARTED THINGS TO ME THE LIPS THAT USED TO KISS ME SPOKE AND THE ONCE SAFEST PLACE ONE OF MY FAVORITEST PLACES TO BE, NOW BROUGHT ME MORE HURT , PAIN AND NOW WAS A MANIPLIATIVE FORM OF SAFETY AND SECURITY, CAUSING ME HARM, I BEGAN TO REALLY NOT BELIEVE HIM ABOUT ANYTHING I MEAN REALLY WHEN YOU SAY THINGS LIKE “YOU F—– WH—, I WISH I WAS WITH A REAL GIRL TO BE A REAL GIRLFRIEND AND SO ON AND SO FORTH ETC, WHATEVER IM SURE YOUR MIND CAN THINK TO BE TOLD THAT WOULD JUST RIP YOUR WORLD APART OF I’M PRETTY SURE HE SAID TO ME MORE THAN ONCE, BELIEVE ME, GOD I WAS SO STUPID TO HAVE TRUELY BELIEVED IN THIS LOVE SO MUCH THAT NOW MY EVERYDAY FELT SO HEAVY ON ME, WEIGHED ME DOWN, AND NOW MY HEALTH ALSO BEGIN TO TAKE A TURN FOR THE WORSE. I WOULD PRAY AND ASK GOD TO HEAL WHATEVER WAS BROKEN HERE, BECAUSE WHAT OR HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LIVE WITH HIM DINO NOW I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO FUNCTION WITHOUT HIM MY CO-DEPENDANCY WAS WAY PAST THE LIMIT , I CANT BREATHE WITHOUT HIM, I CANT SEE WHATS RIGHT AND WRONG? MY WHOLE WORLD WAS CRASHING AROUND ME AND I WAS NOT UNDERSTANDING HOW WHEN I KNOW I DID WHATEVER IT WAS I NEEDED TO DO TO MAKE SURE WE WERE FED AND CLOTHED AND PAMPERED ALITTLE HERE AND THERE. WHAT WAS THE PROBLEM AT THAT MOMENT I FELT LIKE I WAS DYING, LITERALLY. I JUST WANTED GOD TO TAKE ME TAKE ME WITH HIM HERE AND NOW……………….. IS THERE HOPE FOR KIRA AND DINO FIND OUT IN THE NEXT EPISODE.

(Screen) Name: kiraagreene

Comments

comments

Powered by Facebook Comments