I was in my first year college when I had my first relationship with a guy. My high school was pretty much empty when it comes to love. Anyway, let’s just call this guy “L.” L was everything you could ask for in a guy, he’s smart, a true gentleman and the over-all package of a guy. It all started with our friends’ jokes and teases that we became close with each other. Until that day came when we confess each other’s feelings and well, being new to the experience. (We’re not really the gf-bf relationship, just a sort of)I was all red after that and I couldn’t keep myself from smiling. But months after since I was conservative little girl, I want to became dominant in our relationship and set rules for us to follow. It started o-kay but then we become pressured it and so we abolished the rules. The most peak moment of our so-called relationship was during Christmas when he gave me a necklace with a heart pendant and I just gave him two handkerchiefs (I’m so lame at buying gifts)and L also gave me a bouquet for Valentine’s. Its the first time I received a bouquet from a guy though (feels ecstatic). But when April came and since we’re not classmates anymore because he has transferred into a new section and so we barely see each other. I was happy by that because that means, we’re not going to be together at all times. But then, I started having this feeling of being bored by this relationship (It doesn’t seem to give me the spark like I used to have when we first met.) I was looking for something else and so, after our classes we decided to eat lunch together and at that moment, I told him how I feel that we will be better off as friends and gave him a couple of reasons. And you know what he did? He just smiled and said one last time, “I’ll wait for you and I love you!” The first time he said I love you to girl and the first time I heard it from a boy. Then he stood up and walked away and he never glanced back.

The weeks that followed was beyond torment. I was gossiped by my friends and told me the regrets that will follow for letting go so easily. But I stand my ground and told them I wasn’t happy and I want to focus on my studies. L and I never talked and looked at other’s eyes. We avoided each other at all costs or perhaps I was the one avoiding him But at the end of May, we came across each other and I looked down. He passed by me and something made me look back and there! I saw him gesturing a hello and smiling. I smiled back! That was the first time we’ve looked at each other for how many weeks. I was happy that I was looking forward to something new and letting go of the past. I was not yet ready but I know time will come and I secretly hope that there will be an “us” someday.

Right now, we are classmates and well we’re practically the bestest of the best of friends. We know each other so much. And you know about that “wait” thing he said, well it’s kinda like a hanging thread for me– because I promised to myself that i’ll wait too for the right moment. He doesn’t know that I’m secretly waiting too 🙂

xX We have the right love at the wrong time xx

(Screen) Name: kyllarubire

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