I was 15 years old when I started going for tutions. In this one tution this particular guy ( used to come. Tall and really good-looking. Mostly I never saw him. Would not pay any attention to him. Then one day I sort of see him and it hit me like a tonne of bricks. I at first had a tiny crush on him. But he was a really shy guy…always keeping to his work . He would not talk to any of the girls. So I thought atleast I should be his friend. And I without asking take his number from the teachers phone. When I call him in the begining he is rude to me and doesnt like me taking his number without his knowing. So I send him a request on facebook. He accepts it and we are friends. Now when school re-opens one day I come to know that his childhood friend is my big time enemy. So she comes to know that I know him and she teases me in school saying that ” Ya he really likes you and all”. Ofcourse I dont believe her. So I ask him , what had he told her. He told me that he is not interested in this argument and I should sort it out with her. Apparently my enemy had spread a rumour in school that ‘I had proposed to him, he said no to me, but then took pity on me and said yes and we are dating.’ When you are in this situation even if ur friend is telling a lie you land up believing her and not the person who is speaking the truth.He stopped talking to me. We never spoke from august 2010 till march 2011. I still saw him in the tutions and he behaved as if nothing had happened. I felt butterflies in my stomach when I used to see him.
Now the horrible part was that I lied alot in this year. Regarding this guy. In my heart I wanted things to go in a particular fashion so I Lied about it. Even to my best friend. She figured out and helped me throughout. So I wanted to confront him about why he stopped talking to me without clarifying stuff. I started talking to people who knew him because I knew it would get him angry. By now it was sometime in feb 2011.
In March I had my std 10th board exams. Throughout them, I sent him “All the best” for all the exams and he replied to them. Finally after the exams were over, on 29th March 2011 he finally confronted meand he was damn pissed. He kept asking me questions on facebook and I was replying to them and vice versa. I cried throughout. Then finally it was peace and I still had not told him the whole truth. To make matters worse, a few of my tution friends told him things which I had lied about. It got him angered. Those girls told me to remove him from facebook and forget him. I tried committing suicide that day by jumping off a train. But luckily my mom called me and I did not jump.
Then in June 2011, our History teacher through a party it was a blast I danced whole night but my heart skipped a million beats when I saw Him. I still remember he wore a black shirt with blue jeans and black shoes. He noticed me too but I just could not face him. HOW would I ? But that night I did not bother much. During and after the party my school friends told me that he kept looking for a reason to come our way or look at me. But I did not give it a thought. The following week I sent him a message on FB and said that I was ready to tell him the truth if he was interested in knowing. When he agreed to hear me out. I told him everything. He only said that he didnt want to discuss this issue anymore.
Then in July we got addmissions in college, I promised my best friend that we would be in the same college. But when I got the news as to which college he was in, I took the college right next to him because I loved him and I knew I would never see him again.
When college started I saw him everyday sharp at 2:00 My college friends were very supportive of me. I always notice in college while passing in the canteen he always looks at me and I turn and look at him. Then there is a minute where we both look at each other and ttime stops. SO…in december 2011, I again ask my friend to message him and ask him what is the problem. He spoke to her and told her that he has forgiven me and he knew I liked him thats why he did not want to continue being friends with me. He also told her thats it was upto him if he wants to talk to me or no.
Now after all this I still love him and everyday my love grows stronger. And all he does in college is stare at me. I feel he just lied to my best friend about what he feels. He is a very education oriented guy and I know education is important. But I am not asking him to fall in love with me, I am just asking him to see how I actually am and not presume me to be a liar.

This is for u : You know I have been talking about you if you ever read this. I just want you to know that this happened when I was 15 and now I am 17, I have changed and you deserve to know me not the false rumours you heard about me. I really love you, and no matter what anyone says I always will wait or you.

(Screen) Name: goneforever

I feel a slight twinge of shame when saying it, but I met my current boyfriend and possibly last boyfriend on the popular networking site, Facebook.

It all started about a month before final exams, and I was procrastinating as usual on Facebook. Specifically, I was browsing through the popular YouTube make up artist: Michelle Phan’s Facebook fan page comments. While scrolling down, a face caught my eye. He was “cute” as you may describe it, so I decided to take a look at his comment. It stated something about Michelle never messaging him back and therefore she was mean. Being somewhat of a “troll” myself, I could tell this was an subtle and well played attempt at trolling, and that many would be “butthurt”; and many were. Feeling that it would be the most polite thing to do, I calmly commented how he was just joking, in a way, and that people should just stop overreacting.

He thanked me and added me shortly after. I wasn’t expecting that, as I thought the comment would just be a passing event, but after accepting the friend request, I messaged him with a “Hi :)”. He was cute anyway.

From there, we started talking, first through Facebook messages and chat, then through msn. I actually used to have a bad habit of flirting with guys online, and at the time I also even had a boyfriend, though not a very good one. During those days that I would talk to this boy on msn, he was just another guy that I would flirt with, just another person to occupy my time. I also found out he was 5 years older than me, and at the age of 15, I wasn’t expecting anything to happen anyway. It was harmless and all in good fun, but from the way he talked to me, it seemed like he felt more, although I had no idea how that could cross his mind at such an early stage. One day, he asked me if we could talk on the phone. I felt reluctant, as I usually limit myself to online, but eventually I agreed and we talked.

That night we talked for approximately 5 hours, all the way into the morning. We joked, had deep conversations, and he voiced how he was attracted to me…*really* attracted to me. I was slightly taken aback, as I thought the way he talked to begin with was slightly, how may I put it, gay sounding, so I wasn’t too eager to reciprocate the feeling, but I was still happy to call him my good friend.

A few weeks passed, and the exams were over with, and my current boyfriend was going back to Hong Kong for the summer. The guy that I was talking to online and now on the phone for hours convinced me to break up with my boyfriend, so I did. It actually lifted a great weight off my shoulders, and I appreciated the phone guy, who we shall call “David”, that much more.

Time went on, and eventually, I grew more and more attracted to him, up to the point where I really liked him, but I wasn’t sure where it would go. We shared everything with each other, our family stories, friend stories, secrets, tears, laughter, and happiness. That month, I was to go on a 10 day trip to Italy with my school choir; I waited all afternoon before the plane ride at the airport for him to call. He called while we were boarding the plane, and while we were talking, he shyly said,

“Hey…hey…you’re cute. Hey…hey….you’re beautiful. Hey…hey…… I love you.”

I got tears in my eyes and replied,

“I love you too…I’m going to miss you so much.”

“I’m going to miss you a lot too my princess. Don’t worry though, I’ll find a way to call you, to get to you. Anything for my princess.”

My heart felt so conflicted, both swelling with love, while also prickled with sadness to think that I wouldn’t be able to talk to my David for 10 days…

The next morning, while sleeping in my Italian room with my roommate, the phone rang. I was still asleep, so my roommate picked up, and after realizing who it was, woke me up to give me the phone.

I muttered a groggy, “Hello?”

“Hunnie!”

“Bearbear!” (My nickname for him hehe)

“Aw babe, did I wake you up from sleeping? Do you want to go back to sleep for a bit?”

“No, no, no. It’s almost time to wake up anyway, and I want to talk to you.” 🙂

He asked me to be his girlfriend that day, June 26th, 2010. I found it silly that he even had to ask, because he already knew I loved him and would be more than happy to be his girlfriend! 🙂 Silly bear.

Anyway, that entire trip, all I could think of was him. All my shopping was for souvenirs to send to him (he lives 3 hours away by plane), and he would call me every night, no matter how expensive the rate was. That trip, even though we were further apart, it was the distance that actually strengthened our relationship even more.

After returning from Italy, we had our ups and downs, but they were always resolved, and they added to the strength of our connection and love for each other. I ended up telling my older and younger sister, and my best friend, all of whom disapproved heartily, but I didn’t let them affect what we were. The past month or two have been hard though, because I have been with either my sisters or with my best friend on vacation, on and off for a week at a time, so I have not had enough time or privacy to talk to David.

Currently, I am visiting my older sister in the States with my younger sister, and it is simply too risky to talk to my bearbear on the phone, so I have to rely on online means again. He’s going to come to where I live soon, possibly in September or October. I am so excited for that day, when we can embrace and kiss and feel our bodies finally with each other. We have already planned out how it will work. I will go to the airport to go see him, and I’ll run towards him, he’ll pick me up and spin me around while hugging me. It’s going to be picture perfect.

I think of him every moment I wake, and every second I sleep. My thoughts aren’t childish romance dreams,nor are they sexual fantasies. I simply think of him and me lying on the couch together, watching T.V, or just enjoying each other’s company. No awkwardness, no anxiety, just contentedness; peace. I’m waiting for the day when that may come true. For now, I’m happy with our unconventional love, with our destiny to be together. The Princess will forever be with her Bearbear.

(Screen) Name: Unconventionally in love

“MY HEART WAS BROKEN INTO PIECES, BUT I LOVED YOU WITH EVERY PIECE OF MY BROKEN HEART ’’

I realized that I was in love when the words mentioned above struck my heart. Every one experiences love once in life time….love has nothing to do with caste, creed, and religion. As they say love is blind and this is what exactly happened in my life.

It’s a long story which I am very proud to share with all the lovers.
I was just eighteen when I met this girl when my sister brought her to our house. She was so pretty and innocent that she could not lift her eyes to take a glimpse of me. And I complained to my sister, your friend did not even say hi. After two days I got a call from her saying, can I speak to your sister please? It was repeated twice. But the fact was my sister was just an excuse, where as my sister stood beside her when she called up. I did not about it until she told me a year later.
One fine day she came to my house with my sister and my mom requested her to stay over night. I was very glad to see her as she said hello to me. In another two days I was suppose to go to Chennai for pursuing my graduation and I requested her, why don’t you stay for another two days till I leave. And she said ok. As a part of our tradition we always take blessings from neighbors and the elders before leaving home and so the previous night I asked her to join me to receive blessings. We both went to one of my neighbor’s house which had a nice dog that tried to greet me by jumping over. She was scared and she caught hold of my hand and the very moment I had the feeling that I want her. When I finished visiting, I asked her if she could be willing to come with me for a walk. She wanted to ask my sister if she could go with me but then I stopped her. I took her to a lonely place where almost the streets covered with darkness with just the moon light. She said she was scared as it was dark out there. But then I told her not to be afraid I am with you. And then stood in one corner above a lake where water was flowing. There was a long silence….I wanted to tell her about my feelings but then my hands were almost shivering. The time was running short and we had to leave that place. As we were walking I suddenly stopped and decided to have the courage to express my feelings towards her. And I asked her, will you give me whatever I ask you? She stood confused for some time and she said, I will give you if I can. Then I asked her will you give me a kiss? Listening to me she was so surprised and perplexed that she could not answer me. But then she asked me, what relationship we have that she can share a kiss with me. But then I could not answer her. I told her its ok I do not want the kiss lets go home and I turned around and took a step, but she caught my hand and I asked me, do you love me? And I said nothing. But by then she was in love with me and agreed to share a kiss with me later, but she did not know when. After dinner everybody went to sleep. I was sleeping in my room and she was sitting in my sister’s room. I made sure that everyone was asleep before entering my sister’s room. I woke her up and told her to come to my room and I went back to my room. I was waiting but there was no sign of hers. I went again and told her to come, she said she was afraid. I told her every ones asleep and so nothing would happen and I went back. She came to my room after sometime and set on my bed. I asked her have you come here for sitting? She told me she knew not what to do and so I told her to lie down and I kissed her. That was the first kiss we both shared. But even after I kissed her I did not realize that I loved her. The next day I left. The house where I was staying did not allow us to have cell phone and so we could keep in touch. One fine evening she rang up on the landline and I was very happy. Since we had a time table where I stayed it was not possible to ring up too often because everyone used to get calls within the allotted time. And luckily she got me on line. The moment she heard me I could sense the kind of joy and happiness that she was filed with. Before keeping the phone she said something strange, I LOVE YOU. But I said nothing and cut the call. And that have been the first time I broke her heart. I went home for Christmas and I called to my house. During that time I had other girlfriends of mine and I considered her as one among them. I used to step out of the house and come back only in the evening, and after coming home I used to keep my self busy on the phone talking to my other girlfriends. I hardly had any time for her; accept at night on the bed. How she must have felt? But she never complained. The same things used to repeat every time I went home. I was hurting her so much without realizing the pain she underwent. But finally the day came when expressed her feelings by saying the most touching words, ‘YOU REMEMBER ME ONLY WHEN IT IS TIME TO GO TO BED.’ Her words touched my heart and I realized that I was in love with her. That was the day my life changed completely. I knew I was grown up and I have certain responsibilities on my shoulders. I was no more the same person as I was before. For the first time in my life I felt as if I belong. My eyes almost filled with tears and my soul was rejoicing. And for the first time I said to her the most awaited words, ‘I LOVE YOU.’
This is not the end but there is something that I have not mentioned throughout the first part of my love story.

The girl whom I love belongs to Hindu Religion and I am a Christian. We have been in love for last 3 years but our only concern was will our parents agree for our marriage. I love my mom a lot and she loves me too. I thought my mom would understand me but then when my home people came to know about our relationship, they were so angry that they stopped speaking to me. There was so much of sadness in my house. No one spoke to me properly. My mom insisted that I should leave her. She would all the time remind me that people will talk bad about us and it will bring bad name to our family. She is not at all ready to accept our relationship. I made her understand as much I could but nothing works out. There is no way I can leave her because I love her so much. She is the one who changed my life for better and I have dreamt my future through her. I was so depressed and I did not know what to do. Finally a time came when I had to raise my voice against my mom inspite of my unwillingness to do so. But I was helpless and I told her that I do not care to what my neighbors and relatives say. I do not care what the society and my friends think about me. I used all the terms and my words hurt the most. But the truth is, I did not mean to hurt her. I was just trying to say that my LOVE IS TRUE.

I also met my girlfriend parents I told them that I love and want to marry her, but Religion is the problem for them.

We love each other so much that we cannot live without each other even a single moment. But no one wants to understand us. Every one thinks how the people around will react to this. But no one cares for the two hearts beating as one.

I would end up saying, SHOULD RELIGION BE A BAR FOR MARRIAGE?

Thank you Shana for making me the kind of person I am today and I am sorry for all the times I have hurt You.
I love you a lot!

Love – Leslie
Goa, India